Rock Bottom
I have hit rock bottom. All I do is sit in my room alone uploading depressing songs to my iPod. I never thought I could sync solo.
Shakespeare hated hugging. He was a no holds bard.
I ran into a few difficulties when I first started my business of providing exercise routines for 70’s rock bands. It is fine now though, I have worked out the kinks.
I have just been to see the optician, I keep seeing puff pastries out the corner of my eye. Turns out it is just profiterole vision.
My partner went mental when I lost yet another set of keys. To make things worse, he has banned me from playing the piano.
I knew I should have taken that fork in the road. I have just seen a sign saying there’s a dip ahead.
I am terrible at music – I thought a metronome was a midget on a Paris tube train.
My boss came to me today and said, “I need someone to finish this report by Friday.” I replied, “Have you tried Robinson Crusoe.”
The boss caught me stealing car parts at work. I got the boot.
Due to a factory error, my phone now has a colander instead of a calendar. It really drains the battery.