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Mad over Fifties Club

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ladyalex | 20:56 Sat 26th Mar 2011 | Quizzes & Puzzles
211 Answers
The Club is now Open.

Good evening and welcome, everyone.

As the weather has been a little kinder to us of late, the clocks are due to change tonight and the Dark Blues have won the Boat Race, perhaps there is some truth to the rumour that Spring is on its way.
However, the nights are still a little nippy, so gather round our cosy hearth for another Club Night.

Drinks and nibbles will no doubt appear shortly and we can only hope that our trusty Matron will again excel herself with a new tailcock recipe. (Last week's amazing creation, the 'Lunar surprise@ lingers firmly in the memories and possibly also the livers of the members who attended last week.)

The raffle cupboard seems to be bare, so presumably all items were won last week...is this a record ?

Here are my donations for this week's raffle:

A packet of cheese and onion crisps . (Hardly flattened at all.)
A small tin of Mint Balls. (No, not Uncle Joe's, they're for the raffle)
A Fair Isle pattern mitt. (Right hand .)

Please feel free to add to them.
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This sounds fun, ladyalex - would you accept a semi-retired lady landowner to the Club??
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Maidup, you are most welcome...perhaps we could share out the cake instead of raffling it ?
Lemon and lavender straight from the boil wash sounds delish.
sorry "I am told that the" should have been added to the text, before the County Finance Officer.....
Evening all x
where's ttfn?
Gosh what a sudden influx, welcome all, do help yourselves to a tipple do.


OOh a grammyfone, yes a perambulation on the terrace in the moonlight with.....


Dt I shall be sure to make not of how many vats are consumed.
the 'phant has been given 'family planning',so should be no probs on that score.I'm going to be presumchus re the cencus,that 1 doesn't need to filled in for here?
Anyone fancy some home-made sloe gin?
Cake anyone?

Its cut and on the dresser, please help yourselves.
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Welcome, Kleiber....have you documentary evidence of madness?
No? Well, we agree that evidence of an application to join is sufficient proof of madness to allow entry.
So, in short, you're in!

DT You sound like a very handy person to have in the club. We coudl do with a blue lamp to lend out to members to light their way home. Any other old tat you want to off load ?
that is some operation that you have been working on, mamyalynne.

If it is of the scale that you indicate, you maybe liable to various excise duties and certainly vat, as you refer too, or indeed Chief Inspector Otter or one of his colleagues may be around to see you this evening.
a wee sloe ginplease,not had any for years!
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Sloe gin???
If you'd mentioned that in the first place I wouldn't have bothered you with application forms.

Evening Supersuezy.....do you not have an outstanding direct debit for me ?
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Hmmm

We may have to have an emergency Committee meeting to consider the position of DT.......I'm not sure how the rules stand on grasses to the revenue....
is DT open to being 'nobbled'?
Thanks for accepting my application to join - could the sloe gin have anything to do with it??? As for mad, yes, totally barking! Anyone who lives up a mountain in west Wales with sheep, pigs, cats, dogs & chickens for company has to be crazy, n'est-ce pas?
Oh dear now let us calm down ,far too early for anything quite so political, the revenue you say, Milady will decline before 10pm at this rate.

Suezy ttfn is not up to par tonight and is resting.
definitely, lady alex. I have:

a rusted hammer, most useful to replace the knocker off one's door
one aspirin, half chewed so easily digestible for any stroke victim
six spent matches, to convince the insurance company that yobbos burnt down the house/shop/colabarium
an old condom, used only once, to prove that the bearer is not catholic.
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Too bad about ttfn, Hope she feels better soon.
any of your animalls have more that the required number of boby parts?
Oh Kleiber you speak in mountainish too, how fab.

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Mad over Fifties Club

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