Mad Over Fifties Club

[nungate]

Time again for Nungate Towers to throw open it's doors and welcome all you Mad over fifties. Tonight we shall be having a bonfire party out in the courtyard with fireworks galore and a barbeque! Tonight's tailcock will be the Super sparkler, guarnteed to make your evening go with a bang! For those not inclined to venture outside we shall be serving a delicious Bonfire Hotpot in the Great Hall with the customary horses doovers, canopies and volly vonts
and on the pudding trolley is plum duff and custard, there is also a copious number of toffee apples available (the toffee apple harvest has been spectacularly good this year) As usual the Minstrels will be in the gallery playing their usual selection of madrigals and toccatas, and as an added bonus they will also be giving us as selection of Abba's Greatest Hits.
For the rofl tonight, I have 1 witches hat,
more toffee apples
a pair of vampire fangs (found in the gents
ablutions)
even more toffee apples (did I mention we have a
glut this year?)
As usual there is bungee jumping, the hot tub is fired up, and the local Morris
Dancers will be on hand to prance the evening away in the courtyard
A warm welcome awaits all who dare enter..........(evil laughter!!!!!)

[DTCwordfan]

Good evening all............and excursion to the Rat and Testicles completed, their spider lasagne delicious, the vampire blood of an acceptable palate.

Offer for the Riffle:
One spider with only two legs (nearly wrote eggs)
One Church organ, with only three pipes
A single tined fork, excellent for eating slugs and oi-tony-sters.
One pumpkin minus eyes and pips
One pecan pie without the can - clotted cream extra.
One plank, one way
Glasgow traffic light, bulbs stolen
One male PC helmet minus badge
One pair of fem PCs panties, embroidered "hallo, hallo, what do we 'ave 'ere"
One ghost minus bones.

[queenofmean]

what is it this time tony?

[DTCwordfan]

what's he been up to this time QoM?

[nungate]

Hello there DT - Nice evening at the pub then? Maybe you can help sort of QoM's love life - she's doing my head in!!

[queenofmean]

Mum, can we just leave my woes regarding grandmama to DT and not inflict anything else on him.

DT he had in the navy stuck in his head lol

[DTCwordfan]

The Queens Navee stuck in Tony's head - impossible. His bum maybe, but not his head.

That's what daughters do, Mum Nungate.........

[DTCwordfan]

a fine spread, nungate......a wee glass of wine or two and a Sipsmiths.

Thought excel may have been on as he has landed a tablet at next to nothing prices so is back up and running, if he isn't too confused. Said I would be late over there.

[queenofmean]

PMSL DT

[DTCwordfan]

so what has been happening up in the nungate towers?

[nungate]

Just the same old, same old DT

[DTCwordfan]

the same old DT??? I'll have you know that I am fit young virile muscle heaving Chippendale piece of furniture.

[nungate]

Oh dear, offence has been taken where none was intended. The "same old" was a means of saying nothing much.
Everyone hereabouts knows what a fine specimen of manhood you are!

[DTCwordfan]

I'm just taking the piss, nungate..... decrepit wizened 95 year old cane seat may be another mental image........it was them commas!

So (i) QoMs eyes and hips ok? (ii) I won't ask about the love life (iii) Grandmama offline (iv) Lothian gone cold? I ventured out to the local with the mater and the prospect of the manager's (rather tasty she is too) partner playing muzak did her in - The Dream of Gerontius or the Port Isaac Fisherman's choir it was not.

[nungate]

Eyes fine. Hips not so much - physio required. Grandma dotty as ever, getting worse though. As for the love life - I'm so confused my brain hurts!!!

Thinking about opening the bottle of raspberry gin I bought last week...........

[DTCwordfan]

so where are folk tonight?

[nungate]

Yes Lothian cold and damp, want to transfer to Towers to a warmer clime

[queenofmean]

My peepers are ok ta DT have two up and coming appointements with the eye hospital, hip still dodgy. I'm not sure how to broach the latest antics - i found it utterly amusing probably for all the wrong reasons - I shall email you soon to explain. Lothian = BALTIC

[DTCwordfan]

Glad to hear about the eyes - that must be a big relief and long may it continue....

Physio - well that's to be expected......I sympathise though as we all do..

Grandma - sorry but the only way is down, that's one commonality with the pathway they chose ever so different......mine is people and what happened, even an hour ago (like tonight with one of our neighbouring farmers and they are ever so nice - didn't know them from Adam and Eve) but we have had no wandering....

[tonyav]

Hey DT, you leave her Majesty's Royal Navy and my bum out of this if you please, and wheres my fish and chips ?.

[DTCwordfan]

one upfront one, QoM and Mum Nungate - enjoy the humour in the situation, it's a wonderful way to recharge yourselves and, no, you are not being disrespectful, as long as it's not with her when she's not there. Occasionally even my mother laughs about how dotty she is, on the days/moments when she is there. That's one thing folk on the outside don't appreciate, that they can have their good and bad days - this is not a "straight-line" illness.