Mad over fifties club

[ladyalex]

The club is now open.


Two knitting bags and a selection of large triangular knitted garments were found scattered around the clubhouse last week. Any member who thinks that they may have lost such items should apply to someone.

[Jan1957]

Have you seen my husband? He disappeared with those floosies last week and hasn't been home since. Oh well, I'll just have to find a new one.

Is there any entertainment tonight by the way?

[ladyalex]

Sorry, Jan, no husbands, just knitting bags and strange triangular garments.

Tonight's entertainment is an interesting talk on 'Books I have read' by someone who volunteered to come along tonight.

[caththecrazy]

There is always entertainment - sometimes not scheduled though.

I'm wearing a pirate costume as my son had a party today and the theme was pirates and I 've not changed yet.

Is one of them Mama's knitting bag - she's probably got Jan's husband in there too or under the stairs....

[ladyalex]

Arrr, belay, ye swabs.
Just trying to fit in, cath.
Pieces of eight, pieces of eight.

[Prudentia]

Strange triangular garment, could it be my missing thong? I seem to have mislaid it , sometime around dusk last evening, oh never mind, it was just a thong at twilight.

[caththecrazy]

Ladyalex very impressed and so will the parrot be - I'll have to bring him too.

Jan you'll be able to find a new husband - we always have a lot of men in uniform don't we? In fact get 2 so if one goes awol you'll have aspare

[Prudentia]

Think husbands are BOGOF at Asda, or was that bu**er off, don't have my reading glasses?

[caththecrazy]

Well never mind Prudentia - sure someone will get whatever was bogof they usually do

What's in the raffle?

[ladyalex]

Tonight's raffle prizes are the ever popular Deep heat and packet of Tenas. Plus a plastic Rain Mate (orange with green polka dots, very fetching) and a Bottle of Senokot.
Any donations towards the raffle would be gratefully received.

[ladyalex]

avast

[caththecrazy]

I found a tin of corned beef use by date has been crossed out I'll donate that

[grasscarp]

i am here to get my tablecloth. i have a large bottle of gherkins gift for the raffle.

[Prudentia]

I would like to donate simon cowell as first prize, and two simon cowells' as second prize and so on until he falls over and someone treads on his head.

[caththecrazy]

well I don't know if the bouncer will let him in Prudentia - she was quite fussy the other week

where is she this week?

And who is in charge of the tea urn and why hasn't matron shown up? Does Mama remember she's matron?

[ladyalex]

prudentia, that is just plain genius.
Trouble is whoever wins all the Simon Cowells will never want to take them home, so we'll be stuck with them in the cupboard under the stairs. There's hardly any room left there between the male voice choir and the rugby boys.
Genius, though.
Avast.

[ladyalex]

I haven't seen Mamy/matron all week. I think she may have escaped.......
Pieces of eight, pieces of eight

[grasscarp]

Mama is in dereliction of her duty.

[sleekit-kate]

hello i'm here,i've brought klondyke,he hasnt stopped talking about you all week

[ladyalex]

Has she taken holy orders ?

[caththecrazy]

Just don't donate Amanda Holden as a prize as all the men will be chasing after her and we'll never have any fun