Life

[retrocop]

1. When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison.

2. To me, "drink responsibly" means don't spill it.

3. Age 60 might be the new 40, but 9:00 pm is the new midnight.

5. The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

6. When I say, "The other day," I could be referring to any time between yesterday and 15 years ago.

7. I remember being able to get up without making sound effects.

8. I had my patience tested. I'm negative.

17. I don't mean to interrupt people. I just randomly remember things and get really excited.

18. When I ask for directions, please don't use words like "east."

19. Don't bother walking a mile in my shoes. That would be boring. Spend 30 seconds in my head. That'll freak you right out.

20. Sometimes, someone unexpected comes into your life out of nowhere, makes your heart race, and changes you forever. We call those people cops.

21. My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb.

[maggiebee]

Thanks for the laugh - I sure needed one.

[zebo]

No 2, I can recall when we used to say Don't drink and drive, you might spill some. (Yes, I know it was irresponsible!)

[marval]

I like them

[david small]

Thanks retro some good ones there.

[Patsy33]

Lol..

[Old_Geezer]

But they're all true.

[Buenchico]

When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison . . . or an air lock!

I can relate to all of the others though! Thanks!