A Question For The Ladies

[Marijn]

I hate being called "madam". Mostly this happens at restaurants by waiters, and it makes me cringe. I just wondered if I am alone in this, or if most us felt the same about it.

[TheOtherHalf]

a female colleague calls everyone (male or female) hun. Its awful. I think she thinks shes sounds friendly but somehow it sounds false when said with her grin

[RATTER15]

I often refer to Women as Madam and men as Sir, isn't it just being polite and courteous?

I dont see it as being in the least bit disrespectful.

[Marijn]

Hi Ratty, I like the waiter, or whoever it is being polite, that's lovely. I just don't like the "Madam" bit on the end of the sentence. Thank you very much for answering everyone. I have to go to work now, so I won't be here to thank anyone else who may answer, until much later today.

[Bbbananas]

It's not disrespectful ratter, quite the opposite., its just that women of a certain age (say, 35 upwards to around 60 ish) don't like how it makes us feel old !!!

[Sharingan]

If anyone calls me 'hun', 'babes', 'hunny' etc I'd zap their eyes out with my superpowers, I absolutely hate it ;(

[Marijn]

I've just seen your answer Ratter. I just want to clarify before I go out, that I don't find it disrespectful, I find it OVERrespectful and that's why it makes me cringe. I really am going out now.

[B00]

Meh! I've been called worse.

[TheOtherHalf]

As I said earlier, I would rather be called madam than the other things. It doesnt make me feel old and Im 61. I think `sir` is ok too for a gent. I dont use these phrases at work though as we are only a canteen. If I know the staffs name, I will use it but for visitors, just a friendly smile

[keyplus90]

I think its to do with someone being nice. But then again this is the change we are going through. Most of the things that people appreciated only few years ago are into the bad bracket now.

Perhaps nest time you should take a big printed card or sign board with you saying "call me Marjin (or whatever) and do not call me madam". Just as this woman is showing in the advertisement about ISA.

[Booldawg]

I hate being called madam as well.

[jomifl]

Never been called 'madam' though my wife has. A brothel keeper is 'a or the madam', would you prefer mzzzz?

[woofgang]

I am quite happy to be called Madam...I can remember when it was "Modom" as per Are You Being Served?

[jomifl]

(in France) I refer to my wife as (madame),it sounds a little more respectful than 'her' or 'my woman'.

[Marijn]

Keyplus, I have been called "madam" in restaurants since I became an adult and I have been an adult for 30 years now, so it's not only recently that I have started to dislike being called it. I have always disliked being called it. So I don't agree with your sentiment about it being the way the world is going. it's good to know I'm not the only one who doesn't like it. I don't feel comfortable with people making a fuss of me, so I think that's why I think "Madam" is too deferential. Thanks everyone for answering.

[Old_Geezer]

I'm not keen on being called sir. I find it a bit patronising. Although I don't see calling a female madam is any worse.

[emmie]

or in the old days it used to be like Mrs Slocum's modom, worse still, and no i don't like it even now.

[craft1948]

I think being called madam is very courteous. I certainly wouldn't like being called any of the offensive alternatives.

[yogasun]

Doesn't bother me in the slightest, quite like it actually.

[Mamyalynne]

'How is your meal, Madam ?' sounds so much better than just 'How is your meal?' and let's not forget the people using this are no doubt only following the rules of the establishment they work in.

[Marijn]

Mamyalynne, you're right, they are probably told to say "Madam".