@Jim - Benevolent god or not - The abrahamic god - the one believed by the faithful of most of the worlds religious people is fundamentally a binary question, with implications and consequences for the foundations of physics, chemistry and biology.
If you have arrived at a rational conclusion, based upon the sum of the evidence to date that god does not exist, then the consequence is that those who do believe have an irrational belief. This is not subject to compromise or accomodation.
Some very well known scientists profess a profound faith, but by and large the only way they can justify that to their own scientific understanding is to say, in essence, that god exists but his impulses are actioned by naturalistic mechanisms - like evolution being gods design, for instance. And actually, that is an unarguable position in the sense that it cannot be disproved.
That is the only way a scientist can avoid the cognitive dissonance of holding 2 otherwise profoundly contrary views.
As for family and friends and so on - your attempts at finding some sort of accomodation or compromise between atheism and theism - in order to retain respect or friendship or love or all of the proceeding for family and friends is always going to fail in such a binary situation. You are trying to change the universe for your own personal situation :)
Recognise that it is just one issue, and that people are more than just one issue. They are the sum of and source for love, respect, aid, comfort and more. You just need to move past the one issue.
Its not necessarily easy, but for family and friends you can overlook one facet of who they are, rather than agonise over some non-existent compromise :)