What did the pirate say when he turned 80 years old? Aye matey.
So what if I don’t know what Armageddon means? It’s not the end of the world.
I’ve been told I’m condescending. (that means I talk down to people)
Guy walks into a bar and orders a fruit punch.
Bartender says “Pal, if you want a punch you’ll have to stand in line” Guy looks around, but there is no punch line.
I got my son a fridge for his birthday. I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
When you look really closely, all mirrors look like eyeballs.