To Forgive A Cheater ?

[AnswersNeeded]

I've been in a relationship for 1 year with this amazing guy. He isn't afraid to show love and affection no matter where. He's always making surprises for me, making me laugh and he always wants to spend time with me. Everything about us is great minus this one thing... He cheated on me, with three girls actually. For months. I had my doubts and asked him about them but he would always say how that's not true, how he could never do that. one month later I get my proof. He's been in a relationship with one of them, with the other he was sexting, and the third one he wanted to marry to get citizenship of the country we live in. I was in shock. broke up with him afterwards and he's been in a *** mood ever since. Crying, begging, anger, depression... He keeps telling me that he did that stupid mistake once and that he'll never do it again. Deep inside, I don't want to forgive him because - once a cheater always a cheater.i don't trust him anymore. But I also know that I will never meet anyone that would treat me so good and sweet like he did, someone who matches me completely. What should I do, I'm so confused about this whole situation?!?!

[Hopkirk]

Another wind up thread, fallen for hook, line and sinker.

[ummmm]

I can understand infidelity if the relationship/marriage is not going well but when the cheater acts like everything is all nice and rosey and you think you're happy.....that's the ultimate betrayal...

Then you have another reason for cheating...they're insecure and desperate for an ego boost.

[ummmm]

Why Hopkirk? Do you not think things like this happen?

[AnswersNeeded]

Thank you all so so much. I didn't expect so many answers.

I really felt like *** for days ,but you all are right. I don't need him. And couple of you really gave me hope that there is someone much better. I guess I just have to wait more.

It's incredible how people can act so good. I would've never said he cheated or lied, that's how good of a liar he was. Thank God I found out on time.
I guess he has to live with that now. Also I'm going to inform that girl he wanted to marry about his intentions.

[naomi24]

//I don't need him. //

You don't. You really don't. Forget him and move on. I wish you a happy life. x

[AnswersNeeded]

Thank you so much, you all are great! Wish you all the best as well

[naomi24]

:o)

[BagPussAA]

If it had been a drunken one night slip up that would be different but he systematically cheated with 3 different women, one of which he was in a proper relationship with and another he was going to marry. Walk away as fast as you can. You deserve someone that wants you.. just you and no one else. The reason he treated you so sweet and good was because he needed you to keep you attention diverted from his lying and cheating.

Find someone you deserve as you deserve much better than this scumbag.

[AnswersNeeded]

Truee! I think so too. Thank you so much too for those words of encouragement.

Today I talked to him and he really believed I would forgive him. When I told him that's not going to happen, he started crying and asking "how can I live without you" n stuff. Saying How I should forgive him because he did *just that one mistake* :0
Just asked him what he would do if I did the same thing that he did to me. He went silent.
So we're done now.

Y'all helped me so much and made me so much stronger with your words of encouragement.

Thank you again

[scorpiojo]

Good luck :-)

[Peter Pedant]

I am not confused
change boyfriend

[tamborine]

dump him before he gets the passport coz he will dump you after.

[dodedo]

Hi there, be strong, you may have feelings for him still and you feel you'll never meet anyone like him, hopefully you won't, people like him never change, they give the sob story of they'll never do it again it was a one off(3 times in his case) how everything will change, but you'll never trust him again, you'll always wonder what he's doing when not with you and that's no good to live your life like that hun, there is always a choice in life, and there's always someone better than this guy, deal with your sadness and move on, he needs to confront how he treats women as much as you need to deal with the end of a relationship, go live your life, believe me life really is to short to have a partner you really won't ever in your heart trust again, so paint on that smile, look at what you do have in your life and move on, good luck hun

[maggiebee]

Leopard doesn't change its spots I'm afraid. When the trust has gone it's time to walk.