She Doesn't Want To Leave School

[renegadefm]

A work colleague of mine has a daughter in her last year of school. 

He was telling me she's dreading leaving school and will miss her friends and the routine and familiarity of going to school. 

When asked she said I'm really anxious about having to leave school, and becomming an adult and having to work. She doesn't want to go UNI or do anything like that. 

She said I look at adults that work, and she said it all seems so boring and all grown ups do is struggle to make ends meet. 

It seems she would just stay in that school situation for the rest of her life. 

I find all this a bit strange as I couldn't wait to leave school. 

I remember my parents and some family members saying to me don't wish your school years away, they should be the best days of your life. But I hated school. 

Seems like my mates daughter is the opposite. 

Is this normal to dread leaving school? 

[barry1010]

Many people find any kind of change difficult and leaving school to start your first job is a major change.

We are, on the whole, creatures of habit 

[Barmaid]

Some people really dislike change.  It is neither normal nor abnormal and simply a reflection of the fact that we are all different.

[Redhelen72]

I had a friend who was a professional student until he was in his late 20's early 30's then he joined the Met!

[Canary42]

She should become a teacher.

[jno]

always keep a hold of nurse for fear of finding something worse.

Still, failure to launch isn't as uncommon as it used to be, and jobs and accommodation are much harder to find, so her fears aren't baseless.

[renegadefm]

barry1010, 

Thats true. 

But is there a shift in trends of how children enjoy school compared to when I was at school early to mid 80's most of my school friends couldn't wait to leave school.

 

But my youngest daughter, shes 8 but loves school, even though I know she's not at big school yet, but I even hated primary school, but kids today seem to actually enjoy it.

I'm not sure whats changed, if anything. 

[davebro3]

I wanted to leave at 16 - most of my mates (at other schools) had left and were in work. I stayed till 18 but my heart wasn't in it. 

[Canary42]

I too hated school (1947-1960).

 

But things do seem more cordial these days.

[renegadefm]

The thing I will say, back to the mid 80's when I left school there was more interest in working and earning money, that was the trend I would say.

For example I was in full time employment from the age of 17, and the 6 months leading to that I did YTS which was an appretaship to become a builder. 

 

These days it's all about going to UNI and further your education, so maybe the future looks uncertain to a child about to leave school today, compared to when I left. 

 

I was so delighted to be working and earning money. But the kids today are in debt before their 20.

 

So that said I can see why a young child could dread leaving school these days. 

[jourdain2]

I didn't want to  leave school really.  After the Leaver's Service when it hit me that all the peer group I knew would disperse, some never to be seen again I was suddenly rather shocked and disorientated. I got over it. 

If renegade's mate's daughter prefers a structured, stable society then she should investigate jobs which  provide that.

[Old_Geezer]

It's just nerves. She will still keep contact with existing friends, and likely make new ones too. She just has to get stuck in and familiarise herself with the world of work. Give encouragement, and let time work it's magic.

[renegadefm]

Old_Geezer, 

 

To be honest I didn't keep in contact with anyone in my class at school after I left. Well all except one of my mates who I am still in regular communication with today. 

 

I didn't deliberately cut off communication with the rest of the class, I just found everyone drifted apart and started their own careers etc. 

 

It's funny looking back, because although I couldn't wait to leave school and start earning money, and become independent, there were elements of school I missed. Mostly my friends, I think the security of having your life all rapped up neatly in the normality of just turning up to school, sit in the same seats, just the whole thing is so different to leaving school and being out in the big wide world, losing friends you have seen every day for years, I can see how it's a big shock to the system and culture change. 

 

Some people handle the shock of leaving school better than others. 

[Cloverjo]

It's understandable that she wants to cling to the familiar setting of school. 
Has she got a part-time job? It might help her to get a Saturday or evening job; waitressing or supermarket to help her dip her toes into the world of work while everything else is still comforting.