Am I Right To Be Offended?

[abbeylee90]

My friend who's hen party I went to a few weeks ago. They told me it was an enclosed wedding but she invited other friends obviously one was maid of honour and invited the other one who came to hen night a few others I know from where I use to work unless her husband invited them but I feel quite hurt that I wasn't invited or even tp the party.

[abbeylee90]

No the bride told me family only and she didn't invite to her hen the maid of honour did.

[naomi24]

There's nothing you can do about it, abbey.  It's done.

[abbeylee90]

Other than don't talk to her?

[abbeylee90]

I haven't said congratulations.

[newmodarmy]

Be the better person Abbey. Congratulate her and ask her how it went. There's no point in trying to get your own back by being rude/ignorant to her.

[naomi24]

Yes, talk to her - and say congratulations.  Rise above it - but just understand she's not your best friend.  

[Karamia]

From what you have said you were not really invited to her hen do. Another person - the maid of honour - invited you. Maybe the bride was upset that you went to hen do. 

Did you behave well at the hen do? Was it the hen do when you had just had seizure then went out after forgetting your  seizure  medicine?

If you made the whole night about you, with others feeling like they needed to look out for you, taking attention away from bride on hen night, then this may not have gone down well and may have been the reason you were not invited to wedding.

[abbeylee90]

Karamina No nothing at all to do with that and if she didn't like me her maid of honour shouldn't have invited me.

[Karamia]

I went on a hen night many years ago where a close friend of the bride-to-be acted appallingly public after getting very drunk and attention focusing all on her. Her behaviour was so bad we all almost got sacked from work due to her behaviour that night and because we were all seen to be with this person. She was cut from coming to the wedding immediately. 

However, her friendship with bride managed to survive after wedding was over as she tried to apologise and  make up for her awful behaviour.

I wonder if your possible undiagnosed autism makes you unaware of how friends see you. 

If you talk bad about any friend to someone else - then all those comments you have said will be told to that friend. 

[albaqwerty]

If you didn't know the bride, you shouldn't have gone and the MoH was wrong to invite you.

[DDIL]

So was it the bride or the maid of honour that invited you to the hen do?

[abbeylee90]

No I don't say all this to my friends and I havent given them a reason to see me as a bad person. We don't work together anymore.

[abbeylee90]

Maid of honour organised it and I've know them all for 10 years.

[calmck]

The wedding  invitations would have been sent out before the hen night was arranged. Possibly the maid of honour did not know you had not ben invited to the wedding. As the wedding is over it is time to get on with your life and not dwell on the past. If you still meet with other girls who were at the hen do just continue your friendship with them

[abbeylee90]

We got all got a WhatsApp group?

[newmodarmy]

^Abbey...sometimes you post meaningless supplementary points that add nothing. Its as if you're desperate to keep the conversation going even though its going nowhere. You just seem to ignore the advice to rise above it and let it go.

[abbeylee90]

I have put Congratulations on her post and nothing been said back 

[calmck]

Now move on. Time to let it go

[Prudie]

Honestly abbey do you ever read back what you've put - she didn't invite so i'm not going to invite her to mine, I'm not going to say this or that, tit for tat etc Seriously it's what would be expected from 12 year olds in the playground.

You have your supporters but to the rest of us it gets more and monotonous. I was wondering if you'd like to hook up with Treacle and give her some advice on here?