Out of the mouths of babes....

[beryllium]

the bible by children

pay special attention to the wording and spelling. if you know the bible even a little, you'll find this hilarious! it comes from a catholic elementary school test. kids were asked questions about the old and new testaments. the following statements about the bible were written by
children. they have not been retouched or corrected. incorrect spelling has been left in.

1. in the first book of the bible, guinessis. god got tired of creating the world so he took the sabbath off.

2. adam and eve were created from an apple tree. noah's wife was joan of ark. noah built and ark and the animals came on in pears.


3. lots wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire during the night.

4. the jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with unsympathetic genitals.

5. sampson was a strongman who let himself be led astray by a jezebel like delilah.

6. samson slayed the philistines with the axe of the apostles.


7. moses led the jews to the red sea where they made unleavened bread which is bread without any ingredients.


8, the egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. afterwards, moses went up to mount cyanide to get the ten commandments.

9. the first commandments was when eve told adam to eat the apple.

10. the seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.


11. moses died before he ever reached canada. then joshua led the hebrews in the battle of geritol.

[Cetti]

Noah's wife was Joan of Ark...... Aren't children wonderful, beryllium, they see things much clearer and honestly.....and without all the rubbish to hinder them?

We could do well to listen to little ones - and be more childlike.

Like these writing letters to God : http://www.goddirect.org/life/writings/june/go dlettr.htm

[beryllium]

oh Cetti, that was just lovely :-). Lots of ohs, and awwwwws and sad bits that made me have a tear and some great lols

I love listening to my nephews and nieces.....and no....I don't know what I'm gonna do when I grow up either lol.....

B. xxx

[Cetti]

I've just found Lot's wife.....a pillar of salt by day and a ball of fire by night - magic!! That should be written into the marriage vows....LOL!!

I do honestly believe that we should maintain a childlike(not childish) outlook on life. It does help enormously when the rotten things of life roll in and try and knock us for six.

[jenstar]

Of course, whoever made these up (and they've been in circulation for a very long time), it was probably a grown-up inventing supposedly cute stuff that they claimed kids wrote, to make other grown-ups go awwww!. I'm not falling for that.

[beryllium]

lol jen :-)

[brionon]

Thou shall not Admit adultery. Priceless,and good advice,too.