A guy walks into a bar and sits down next to a good-looking woman and starts looking at his watch. The woman notices this and asks him if his date is late. 'No,' he replies. 'I've just got this new state-of-the-art watch and I was just about to test it.'
'What does it do?'
'It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me.'
'What's it telling you now?'
'Well, it says you're not wearing a bra or panties.'