high libido...

[wilkesneil]

i'm marrying the woman of my dreams next week but i have this problem where i constantly get turned on by her, even at the sight of her i just get the need to kiss and cuddle her.
in the past i've only had 3 proper g/f and have never been like this and have been months without even kissing them. where has my wife to be has had many partners and has always been wild and always liked doing stuff.

the problem is that when we met things got threw around slightly and now i'm the wild one with the high libido and she's the calm one that isn't fussed about it.

is there anything i can do to try to calm myself down or do i need to let it out my system!!!

[wilkesneil]

yes we have talked and she loves the fact i wanna show the affection and show her what she means but i thought i'd post on here for some advice on lowering my libido off my own back.

[Kiki-frog]

Awww, I'd love that kind of attention. Were it not for my bad back.

:-(

[ummmm]

Neil...keep in your mind, it won't last. She'll probably find it irritating in the end. Affection is nice but if you have a constant hard on whenever you give her a cuddle, she'll stop cuddling you.

[wilkesneil]

1 of the main things that hurts me though i in the past she's had many men and give everything they wanted, all night sessions and orgies etc... but i find it hard to even get a cuddle and a kiss 1/2 the time.

it makes me feel lesser than everyone else but i'm actually marrying her.

[Cockney_si]

Less is sometimes more. Try not to think about what she may have done in the past with others, that will make you paranoid. I think like this sometimes, it's not good.

[wilkesneil]

i know its not good and i do try my best to not dwell on the past as my past is horrendous but sometimes when ive been awake 17 hours and we go bed after her work i just wanna hold her and kiss her and cuddle her before i go sleep, i may get turned on but i just wanna go to sleep knowing i've said a proper good night but it usually ends up with me thinking im not good enough as i just want some love before sleep (as she's not tired) i've explained this too her and she now sees it from my point of view that its a very long day for me when shes working a late so she can see that so we are making progress slowly but i just want her to be at ease with everything. she has had bad experiences with men stealing her money so she can't feed her kids, beating her and anything else you can name is probably happened to her by men.

i feel that her past is in her head and her defence is to push me away so i leave but i wont cus i love her to much, i think this is why she pushes me away cus she usually apologises afterwards

[Cockney_si]

I'm hoping that you're just getting worried as your wedding is soon.

I've been there and now I'm single, not saying that would happen to you, but you must take a step back, give her time and space, in the end I had to imagine cuddling up in my head.

She pushed me away and now we're apart from each other, I (like to think that I) was the best thing in her life and now who knows what's going on in her mind.

She pushed me away a few times and we made up again, but now we're not together and there is nothing I can do or say to make it better, it's under her control.

[tinkerbell23]

Ive felt the way where you want to squeeze someone so tight and you cant squeeze them tight enough....

But its not normal i dont think....dont worry it will level out...you sound like a really lovely guy xxx

[Smowball]

She seems to have told you an awful lot about her past sexual encounters!

[bednobs]

the more you post, the less she is sounding like "the woman of your dreams"

[karenmac60]

It's nice to feel that your partner finds you attractive and wants to be with you in that way - but too much of that can make it seem like she's just a piece of meat to you, that all you want her for is sex and you don't love her for the person she is, just for her body. You need to find a balance and give her a break or she'll get tired of you. You say you are left feeling as though you're not good enough when she turns you down, but you may have her thinking that about herself every time you just want sex from her. As far as previous lovers go, she was younger and maybe wanted to experiment, or maybe felt she had to go along with what her partner wanted in order to keep him. She obviously feels more secure with you in that she feels she can say no and push you off, but she may not keep feeling that way if you make out all you want is sex.

[rowanwitch]

Her previous may have been due to her feeling unattractive and needing attention to feel she is desirable... now she is in a position where she has someone who loves her and fancies her she can be herself and relax it may be she has moved on from sex for gratification to making love... and for a woman there is a huge difference.

[Booldawg]

getting married is one sure fire way to guarantee loss of action. Once that rings on the finger they lose all sense of geography and you'll have to find weird hobbies to occupy your thoughts.

[scraggy55]

That would drive me round the bloody bend! I would ease up if I were you or she is going to start feeling smothered. Best way in the world to push someone away....................

[wendylottie]

please dont do this it does get very annoying and eventually things will start breaking down in your relationship.