Mangled And Misheard

[Captain Spod]

I don't know if these are really malapropisms, but on another thread someone is talking about driving with 'undue care and attention'. This is one of my favourites together with 'mute point' and 'without further adieu'.
Any others to cheer up a snowy April(!) afternoon?

[FredPuli43]

^secretly, not " secretely". Even leeches, as lawyers are seen, barely secrete^

[Wharton]

^He sounds a good lad :-)

[FredPuli43]

Quite like " extinction" for "distinction" in exams, too. Certainly in Law , probably in other fields, where there are final exams in several subjects to qualify, getting a distinction in one labels you for life. You'll be railroaded into some department doing just that and may not escape, when the truth is you don't like the subject in practice and never did. You just happened to get a good mark in it. The distinction is, or could be, an 'extinction' of your plan for your career.

[AB Editor]

This website collects "eggcorns" which people have "eardropped" from idiots and "people of their elk":

http://eggcorns.lascribe.net/

[jno]

the Vatican still used Latin a lot

http://www.vatican.va/latin/latin_index.html

so it's not dead, though it may be quite sic

[vulcan42]

My neighbour was complaining about somebody and said "a man of his calipers[calibre] should have known better"

[Bert]

In an episode of "The Big Bang Theory", the super-intelligent Sheldon character was talking in what he thought was legalese when he said "[name of person, I forget] here and after known as [another bit I've forgotten]", when "hereinafter" was meant. I wonder whether it was the actor's mistake or the scriptwriters'.

[AlwaysConfused]

At work one day, a man asked if we had syphilis. He meant to ask if we sell physalis. I laughed so much, I was in tears!

[AlwaysConfused]

I often see affect and effect misused

[jelly baby]

The local paper reported someone falling and badly hurting themselves on 'a bitchermen path'. (Bitumen)