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BANANASPLITS

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BANANASPLITS

Women Police Officer..

My missus dressed up as a police woman earlier and giggled "you're being charged for being good in bed" But after 2 minutes she said she was dropping the charge due to lack of evidence .....
00:23 Fri 14th Dec 201810 answers, last by BANANASPLITS 20:19 Fri 14th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Sued For Divorce

One of the main reasons I sued for divorce was because my wife always made really weak tea... I ended up having to get a restraining order!...
12:33 Wed 12th Dec 201810 answers, last by Patsy33 18:06 Wed 12th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Job Interview...

This afternoon i went for a job interview at the council. The interviewer asked me what i was good at? "Sod all" i said "Can you start monday "he said...
18:42 Tue 11th Dec 20181 answer, last by jno 18:47 Tue 11th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

A Red Indian Chief....

A Red Indian Chief introduced me to his wife. "This is Four Horses" he said. I said 'Wow, that's a beautiful name, what does it mean? He said, ' Nag, nag, nag, nag!'...
11:35 Tue 11th Dec 201820 answers, last by marval 23:11 Tue 11th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Werthers Original Toffee...

A vicar gets on a train. In his carriage is a group of five fine looking young ladies. To break the ice, the vicar offers round his bag of Werther's Original and then asks, "So, what do you young...
15:09 Mon 10th Dec 20184 answers, last by BANANASPLITS 15:41 Mon 10th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

If Anyone Is Interested...

I'm giving away a free gate. Honestly i am there's no catch!...
14:03 Mon 10th Dec 20189 answers, last by 1ozzy 22:21 Mon 10th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Our Dogs Missing!

Our dogs been missing for 6 hours jumped over gate and gone. Ive looked up and down about 20 local streets and cant find him. I've just rang the wife who shouted at me "try looking harder"! So I've...
17:34 Sun 09th Dec 201816 answers, last by Patsy33 18:38 Sun 09th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Selfies...

People who use selfie sticks need to take a long good look at themselves !
15:33 Sun 09th Dec 201810 answers, last by BANANASPLITS 16:27 Sun 09th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

A Nun....

What do you call a nun who sleepwalks? A roamin' Catholic!...
12:58 Sat 08th Dec 20187 answers, last by Ken4155 19:14 Sat 08th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

What Is The Difference?

What is the difference between erotic and kinky? Erotic is using a feather Kinky is using the whole chicken!...
13:42 Thu 06th Dec 201815 answers, last by simrangoyal 09:27 Fri 07th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

I Hate It....

I hate it when people cant let go of the past! Debt collectors are the worst!...
11:56 Thu 06th Dec 20182 answers, last by BANANASPLITS 12:17 Thu 06th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Its Been Said!

Its been said during sex you can burn more calories than doing a 5 mile run! Who the hell can run 5 miles in 30 seconds!...
17:30 Wed 05th Dec 20184 answers, last by Old_Geezer 10:55 Thu 06th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Grim Reaper....

The grim reaper visited me late last night and said "im death" I said " thats ok I'll speak a bit louder then "...
10:51 Wed 05th Dec 20183 answers, last by Old_Geezer 10:56 Thu 06th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Tattoo.....

I went to the tattoo shop to get a tattoo of an indian on my back. "Dont forget to put a big tomahawk in his hand" i said. The tattooist said " blimey give us a chance mate ive only just finished his...
14:36 Tue 04th Dec 201816 answers, last by Patsy33 18:55 Tue 04th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

My Mate....

Im sure my mate is having an affair with my wife! Hes been really miserable lately...
21:44 Mon 03rd Dec 20184 answers, last by DTCwordfan 20:44 Wed 05th Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Got An E-Mail Today.....

Got an e-mail today from a "bored housewife 32, looking for some action!" I've sent her my ironing, that'll keep her busy!...
13:57 Sun 02nd Dec 20187 answers, last by BANANASPLITS 17:32 Sun 02nd Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Dropped My Viagra Tablets...

I've just accidentally dropped all my viagra tablets on the floor after taking one. I'm on all fives on the floor at the moment trying to pick them up!...
20:58 Sat 01st Dec 20188 answers, last by petermic12 13:36 Sat 18th Sep 2021
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BANANASPLITS

Stopped By A Police Officer!

The police stop an old guy in questionable condition at 1 am. “What are you doing out so late, sir?” asks the police officer. “I’m going to a seminar on ‘The harmful effects of...
17:48 Thu 29th Nov 20185 answers, last by sakshirathor12 13:32 Sat 01st Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Salad For Lunch..

I think that the wife is doing a salad for lunch...either that or the smoke detector needs a new battery ;-)
14:11 Thu 29th Nov 201812 answers, last by sakshirathor12 13:32 Sat 01st Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

I Like A Party....

I went to a party with 100 midgets? i love a little get together....
20:46 Wed 28th Nov 20188 answers, last by BANANASPLITS 21:10 Wed 28th Nov 2018

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