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ELVIS68

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ELVIS68

Number trick......

1, take your shoe size. 2, multiply it by 5. 3, add 50 4, multiply this by 20. 5, add 1012 6, subtract the year you were born. The first two digits will be your shoe size, the last two is your age...
18:45 Tue 18th Sep 201225 answers, last by askyourgran 21:02 Tue 18th Sep 2012
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ELVIS68

MRI scan waiting list......

Last week my doctor said he's going to book me for a scan for my ongoing back problem. Is it a case of going on a waiting list or does it depend on what the doctor has put in his letter to the...
21:42 Mon 17th Sep 201221 answers, last by theprof 22:28 Wed 19th Sep 2012
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ELVIS68

9th Date.......

My girlfriend and I went on our 9th date to see the new Batman movie. Our dates so far can be summarised as follows... Dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, BATMAN. I'll get...
21:05 Sat 08th Sep 201211 answers, last by sophie_1003 06:04 Mon 10th Sep 2012
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ELVIS68

Taxi.....

I was working in the local taxi office last night when I told my boss, "I've just heard one of the drivers sh@gging a woman in the back of his cab. He must have left the radio on by...
20:46 Sat 08th Sep 20121 answer, last by cupid04 20:48 Sat 08th Sep 2012
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ELVIS68

Muscle spasms......

Every now and then I get muscle spasms in my back which last about 5-7 days I take diclofenic and methacarbamol which help with the pain but this week my back went again and I've got a numbness down...
21:10 Fri 07th Sep 201211 answers, last by LoftyLottie 10:33 Sun 09th Sep 2012
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ELVIS68

New Series.......

The cast of Dad's Army are to start tracing their family trees. "Who Do You Think You Are.. Kidding Mr Hitler" starts this Autumn....
22:13 Wed 05th Sep 20127 answers, last by Wharton 23:27 Wed 05th Sep 2012
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ELVIS68

Just for fun Pt II......

Your favourite Olympian and what they do followed by.....In my pants Daley Thompson does the heptathlon, in my pants...
23:38 Wed 29th Aug 20129 answers, last by Maidup 06:58 Thu 30th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Here we go again.....

I've got to do the same walk as last night only this time the moon is shining like a giant torch which lights up my hi-vis jacket. Let's hope the Lion sleeps tonight!...
00:41 Wed 29th Aug 201223 answers, last by baza 00:21 Thu 30th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

My wife's left me because......

I couldn't help swapping chocolate bar wrappers around in the sweet cupboard. I think she got her snickers in a twix...
12:04 Tue 28th Aug 20127 answers, last by fbg40 15:05 Tue 28th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Wish I'd never read about that lion now!....

I'm sitting alone in a van in the middle of nowhere at a level crossing, no houses nearby, no lights for miles and I've got to walk half a mile down the track with a torch for company. Would whistling...
00:47 Tue 28th Aug 201219 answers, last by ELVIS68 16:12 Tue 28th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Can you help?......

****MISSING***** Lost cat, light brown fur, long thin tail. Last seen in the Essex area. Answers to 'Leo'...
19:57 Mon 27th Aug 201219 answers, last by ELVIS68 12:19 Tue 28th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Now wash your hands!.....

I was in a pub the other day and drank a few too many beers, when I got the feeling that I was going to be sick. I ran to the bathroom only to discover that the only cubicle was occupied. My only...
19:52 Mon 27th Aug 20125 answers, last by daftgrandad 17:31 Tue 28th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Just for fun.....

Post your favourite song followed by ...In my pants
22:12 Sat 25th Aug 2012310 answers, last by tonyav 18:09 Mon 27th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

If you could choose......

What music event or concert would you attend past or present and why? Mine would be Pink Floyd at Earls Court in 1994, watching it now and it's mind blowing...
21:37 Mon 13th Aug 201250 answers, last by murraymints 20:11 Tue 14th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

London Riots on BBC2....

Nice of the beeb to drag it all up again so soon after the Olympics
21:17 Mon 13th Aug 20128 answers, last by Lore 01:35 Wed 15th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

A quick Olympic ode...,

We had the doom, We had the gloom, Money, traffic, we had no room, We started well with Jessica Ennis, Then Andy Murray in the tennis, Mo so bold to win his first gold, Chris Hoy showing he's not too...
23:37 Sun 12th Aug 20124 answers, last by Canary42 00:03 Mon 13th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Closing Ceremony......

So far........rubbish!
20:06 Sun 12th Aug 2012343 answers, last by Prudie 17:11 Mon 13th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Gold Post Boxes......

Anyone got one nearby yet? Drove past the one they did for Laura Trott earlier and there was a queue of people waiting to have their photo taken next to it....
10:22 Wed 08th Aug 201231 answers, last by carrust 19:03 Thu 09th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Eye for an eye.......

Two muslims board a plane to find out they're sitting by a US Marine. About an hour into the flight, one of the muslims says that he's going to get a coke. The marine, being nearer, offers to get it...
12:53 Tue 07th Aug 20123 answers, last by chaptazbru 13:50 Tue 07th Aug 2012
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ELVIS68

Nice Keks.......

My wife has just bought herself some Meatloaf knickers On the front it says "I will do anything for love" On the back it says "But I won't do that"...
10:36 Mon 06th Aug 20125 answers, last by Starbuckone 11:08 Tue 07th Aug 2012

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