An old couple celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in a honeymoon suite. All night long, the bellboy hears laughing and clapping sounds from their room. The next morning, he asks the old man how...
A man wakes up in hospital, bandaged from head to foot. The doctor comes in and says, “Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a pile-up a month...
The armies of Alexander the Great were greatly feared in their day, but there was one problem that they had that almost defeated them. Alexander could not get his people to staff meetings on time. He...
A pregnant woman, was feeling most peculiar. She went to see her Doctor. "Doctor", she said, "I'm feeling very strange." The Doctor took a listen, and said: "My dear lady, you're going to be having...
A woman took off her jumper at the breakfast table one warm morning. As she did her tee-shirt started to come off too. Her husband let out a low whistle. She took it as a compliment until he said,...
Nancy was Catholic, but her fiancé, Chris, was not. Since they were planning to be married in the Catholic Church, Chris made sure to listen carefully throughout their prenuptial sessions. At one...
Two Blondes were out hunting. They decided to separate to get a better chance of catching something. The first blonde says to the other, "If you get lost, fire three shots into the air every hour....
A motorist was on trial for hitting a pedestrian. His lawyer argued, "Your Honour, my client has been driving for over twenty-five years." "Your Honour," the plaintiff's lawyer retorted, "if this case...
A husband went to the police station to file a "missing person" report for his missing wife. The following conversation took place. Husband. I lost my wife, she went shopping and hasn't come back yet....
1. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year. 2. On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely. 3. She has had no rigors or shaking chills,...
A prisoner is in the hospital wing. He says to the doctor, "Look here, doctor! You've already removed my spleen, tonsils, adenoids, and one of my kidneys. I only came to see if you could get me out of...
A man loved nothing better than to sit at a nearby bar for long evenings and get stoned with his cronies. But his wife was a social climber, and was prone to having her "ladies" in for bridge etc....
A man called Fred died recently. His will provided £30,000 for an elaborate funeral. As the last guests departed the affair, his wife, Helen, turned to her oldest friend, Judy, and says, "Well, I'm...
A guy walk into a bar and he orders a whiskey. He sits down and just before he takes a sip of his whiskey a guy runs in and says, "Bill! Your house burnt down!" So he runs outside but then he thinks,...
Two blondes were each doing a written quiz. The last question was fill-in-the-blank. "Old MacDonald had a ________." Bubba was stumped. He had no idea what to answer. But he knew he needed to get this...
Can anyone help me? I am looking for 45a. a five letter board game, I have it beginning with H. Unless 30d. spiny marine creature is wrong, I have Sea Urchin.
Thank you...
Little Emily, ran into the house, crying as though her heart would break. “What’s wrong, dear?” asked her father. “My doll! Billy broke it!” she sobbed. “How did he break it, Emily?”...