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marval

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maggiebee

The Exchange

I head out after dark, Moving quickly past the park. In my hand I have my money, It's what I must do and its not funny. Sneaking around in the dead if night, Looking for my dealer who's out of sight....
13:29 Tue 17th Mar 20203 answers, last by marval 22:57 Tue 17th Mar 2020
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melv16

People Are...

...surprised when I tell them I eat road kill. But I'm going to carrion doing it......
12:07 Tue 17th Mar 20204 answers, last by marval 22:56 Tue 17th Mar 2020
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bobbie22

Masterchef

I like Masterchef very much, but I feel sorry for the cooks having to carry plates of food through the double doors for the three judges. If that was me, I would surely drop one.
21:55 Mon 16th Mar 20203 answers, last by marval 22:54 Tue 17th Mar 2020
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Patsy33

Funeral Cancelled

Just had a message to say that my husband's cousin, who was going to have her funeral next Tuesday, has been cancelled. This is because of CV. I was only thinking about this a few days ago. I suppose...
20:52 Tue 17th Mar 20209 answers, last by retrocop 23:48 Tue 17th Mar 2020
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Bobbisox1

It’S Lovely How Communities Are Pulling Together,

There’s a few springing up in and around Tyneside, mostly young people doing shopping and checking the needs of older ones, I’d imagine it must have been like this during the war years too...
12:41 Tue 17th Mar 202040 answers, last by marval 22:42 Tue 17th Mar 2020
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gness

Happy Birthday, Sunny-Dave

I'm sorry that the village has had to cancel the big parade that always happens on your birthday......bloody virus! I'm sorry that I have had to postpone your surprise birthday outing treat.....bloody...
00:21 Tue 17th Mar 202026 answers, last by marval 22:20 Tue 17th Mar 2020
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naomi24

For Those In Isolation...

Something to help fill the time.Play card and dice games against the machine. (Ed's note: Add your own suggestions to this thread!)...
08:30 Tue 17th Mar 202081 answers, last by Togo 13:53 Wed 01st Apr 2020
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albaqwerty

3 Trees And A Woodpecker.

2 tall trees, a birch and a beech are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, The birch says to the beech ''Is that a son of a birch or a son of a beech?'' The beech says he...
22:03 Mon 16th Mar 20203 answers, last by Chipchopper 07:49 Tue 17th Mar 2020
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nailit

Come Back And Berate Me In A Few Months

But theres something suspicious about this pandemic. To many unanswered questions. It supposedly started in Chinese livestock markets, and yet the Chinese have had these markets for years, so why now?...
20:57 Mon 16th Mar 202035 answers, last by Peter Pedant 23:23 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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maggiebee

Panic Buying

Was in a Supermarket earlier. Saw a guy with a trolley brim full of hand sanitiser, nappies, soap, toilet rolls etc. Gave him chapter and verse on being a selfish sod.Told him how mothers, pensioners...
16:39 Mon 16th Mar 20205 answers, last by Tilly2 19:54 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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albaqwerty

Paranoia

has reached absurd stages. I sneezed in front of my laptop and the anti-virus started a scan on its own....
23:45 Sun 15th Mar 20206 answers, last by marval 18:28 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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albaqwerty

Loo Roll In The Woods

A bear, minding his own business whilst wandering had a sudden need to go for a poop. Finding a suitable place, he proceeds to poop but discovers he has no loo roll. A bunny passes by and bear calls...
22:37 Sun 15th Mar 20206 answers, last by marval 18:27 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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melv16

What's The...

... difference between a kangaroo and a kangaroot? One's an Australian marsupial and the others a Geordie stuck in a lift....
19:21 Sun 15th Mar 20204 answers, last by Spicerack 18:28 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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Patsy33

Repent Your Sins!

https://www.gifng.com/animals/71177/...
18:22 Mon 16th Mar 20202 answers, last by pixie374 18:25 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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BAKERS DOZEN

Anyone For Pasta?

Hope the link works....
18:21 Mon 16th Mar 202012 answers, last by shoota 18:38 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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Shaglene

Big Feet............

3 Sisters - Ann, Jan and Fanny Once there were 3 sisters - Ann, Jan and Fanny. All 3 had big feet. Ann was a size 9, Jan was a size 10 and Fanny was a size 13. Ann and Jan went on a double date....
18:49 Sun 15th Mar 20203 answers, last by Patsy33 18:25 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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Chipchopper

Working From Home

I was worried about the corona virus, so I asked the boss if it would be possible to work from home. The boss was very unsympathetic shouted at me: I'm not having you here getting under my feet, Just...
18:16 Mon 16th Mar 20201 answer, last by marval 18:17 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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tiggerblue10

When All Around You Are Losing Their Heads...

...here are some dik dik pics to amuse you ;o) https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=dik+dik&safe=strict&source=lnms&;tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiu0-qiu5_oAhWUEMAKHcOYDWYQ_AUoAXoECBkQAw#imgrc=JKIbrm2TKsd5WM...
17:06 Mon 16th Mar 202012 answers, last by pastafreak 20:52 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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teacake44

Just A Heads Up Really

I have 8 big supermarkets within a 3 mile radius of me, 2x Aldi. 2x Asda, 2x Morrisons, 1 X Sainsbury, 1 x Tesco. just out of curiosity have driven to them all for a ride in the sunshine and to see...
16:07 Mon 16th Mar 202029 answers, last by DTCwordfan 18:12 Mon 16th Mar 2020
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Canary42

Preaching To The Converted

All these public appeals from Supermarkets, Shops, Local Authorities, Government, etc.,for voluntary altruism are just preaching to the converted. The Product Plunderers will just carry on, they're...
15:00 Mon 16th Mar 20209 answers, last by marval 17:52 Mon 16th Mar 2020

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