Women and sex drive...

[kryptic]

This question is primarily addressed to women but can equally apply to men.
If you lost your sex drive, how do you deal with it in terms of your relationship? (Obviously, if you are singe then there wont be much of a problem)
Would you simply sweep it under the carpet and pretend that everything is still OK in your relationship or would you seek some sort of medical advice?
If your partner still desired you (sexually) but you were more than happy just to carry on as though everything were ok, would you expect your relationship to survive?
If you lost your sex drive, do you think that your partner would feel rejected and would you really care anyway?...

[joeluke]

How old is she if you don't mind me asking kryptic?

[kryptic]

joeluke, Im 45, shes 50.

[joeluke]

Menopause?

[kryptic]

joeluke, yep, think so, but shes never been overkeen on sex anyway

[kryptic]

seems to think that as long as shes happy that Im happy (sexually) But im not

[Purple_Popple]

I am so sad to read this Kryptic...you obviously love each other very much!
You sound really sympathetic too...it could just be hormonal on her part perhaps, had she gone through the menopause yet ? Have you tried to talk with her about how she feels and how you feel ? Can you not be 'close' in other ways other than leading to intercourse or does she not even feel like being held or touched ? Sorry if Im overstepping the mark in asking questions here...

[Purple_Popple]

sometimes us ladies get a bit weird and can get a bit 'cold' if we dont feel very good about ourselves too, not being very attractive for whatever reasons...which in turn makes us feel undesirable.

[kryptic]

cone, pinki might have her own troubles...
purple, I just think that i might just give up. Tried everything.

[kryptic]

Toldyaso...wouldnt know mate. Its been so long......

[karenmac60]

No offence intended here Kryptic - but do you pull your weight around the house? As well as the menopause, she could be tired - and if she feels she's doing all the work at home she may feel a little resentful, something that's guaranteed to put the brakes on any bedroom activity.

[joeluke]

Doing the housework is not an excuse for denying a man sex

[karenmac60]

That is not what I said Joe - I said resentment. And I didn't say it was an excuse - I said it was a reason why women sometimes don't feel in the mood. Women aren't like men, they find it difficult to separate sex and emotions, and if they have negative feelings towards someone they are unlikely to want to have sex with them.

[Mamyalynne]

Her age could well be related to her reduction (even further) in sex drive, what is more worrying is her inability to discuss it. Have you tried to speak about it gently rather than in an accusing way?

As others have said, we all need closeness.

[kryptic]

No offence intended here Kryptic - but do you pull your weight around the house?
And no offence taken karen.
I do the dishes, I do the housework, I do the decorating (im a decorator by trade) I do everything....
but im sick of been treated like the live in lover of an ice cube....