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girlfriend wants space what do i do

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needhelpasap | 03:15 Mon 01st Aug 2011 | Body & Soul
8 Answers
My girlfriend and I have been together for almost 4 years. We didn't argue that much or disagree we really enjoyed eachothers company. There was some trust issues on my part and sometimes hers. Before we where together she had a bf for 3 yrs. We are both are 21 which means see has only dated 2 ppl since she is 14. Like 3 weeks ago she told me she needed space but she still loves and wants to be with me. I really love and miss her and don't know what to do part of me wants to tell her I can't do this no more and the other half tells me just wait it out she will realize whAt she had was good and she might lose it. I didn't talk or see her for the first 4 days then she txted me sayin she loves and misses me. So I stepped up hoping we can end this and ask her out it when well but the same thing happened at the end we went our separate ways she texts me almost ever 2 or 3 days saying she loves me.. What do I do I love this girl with all my heart and i know she is the one I wanna start my life and family with. Please help a heartbroken man out. Don't tell me I'm 21 and young live my life I have been for the past 3 weeks and I been thru alot in my life and so has she we are very mature for our age thank you very much


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Nobody is perfect in this cruel world and we all have to have our space whether it's the girl or the boy but don't give up yet. You are mature (I won't tell you that your young) and what you can do is, call her up and set a date where the both of you can sit down and try to works things out. Tell her how you feel with the space that she requested and that it is driving you crazy. If you really love her then I suppose you can wait and be patient for her to get things back to her normal self. If you're not patient then I think you should move on and seek another love of your life.

I've been in that situation, it was really hard to let him go but I had to and I'm still searching for the right person.
sorry to say mate that when a woman pulls the shutters down then its time to be strong, stand up and move on, you have to . no other way of buttering it up. sorry. ive been there too many times myself its not easy.
I'm pretty much with sagz on this one. Get in touch with her, tell her how you feel. Be honest and open with her - it's one thing a woman really wants her man to be. After that, only the 2 of you can decide where you go from there.
I am afraid I want space often means I want a chance to go out with other people because I don't think this is working ... I wonder if in her case she's being quite sensible and thinking she hasn't had enough experience to settle down...... If you feel you can take this chance and can cope if she has a short fling with someone else without it eating you up then give it some time otherwise keep your options open. If she sees go going out and having a good time she might realise it really is you she wants.
She either doesn't want to further your relationship or she in unstable. In both cases my advice is: Find a new girlfriend. You are able to find happiness.
You say that shes the one you want to 'start your life' and family with? Does she know this? How does she feel about this? Not many people of 21 years choose to start a family these days. To a majority of level headed woman , having a family in their early twenties is not on the agender. Perhaps she feels sufficated and needs the space and feels you do too. Perhaps you were tied to the each other hips and were seeing each other far too often and therefore making the balance unequal. I worry that you state 'start your life', believe me there is more too life than family life, (that can start much much later these days). I assume that you saw each other very regularily, perhaps daily!? If you get back together, see each other less make your dates as fun as possible and put out of your mind family life, for a few years.
It might be she just does want some space, get some time to think her life through on her terms, maybe things were getting a bit too serious for her if you are all about wanting to settle down and start a family etc... Doesn't mean she doesn't love you. Love and the practicalities of relationships don't always go hand in hand.

Doesn't necessarily mean she wants to see other people either. She seems to have been in long term relationships pretty much constantly since she was 14, maybe she just wants some time to herself. Suits some, not other, noone can say for sure with both your individual circumstances.

Maybe have a franker talk about what she feels and wants in detail rather than any more all or nothing approach (she loves me/she doesn't etc...). It's not back and white and communication and compromise can go a long way as long as it's not too one sided.

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