Why my man thinks hes' a man...

[Champagne]

1. OPENING JARS - I'm struggling. This is where he comes to the rescue.

2. ARRIVING IN A PUB LATE - And all his mates cheer him. It doesn't mean he's popular, it just means his mates are pi$$ed. However, the rest of the pub doesn't know that.

3. DRINKING UP - Specifically, rising from the table and 'sculling' two thirds of a pint in one fluid movement. Then nodding towards the door, saying, "Let's go" and striding out whilst I'm still sitting there with a full glass of wine. He's hard.

4. HAVING A HANGOVER AND THICK STUBBLE - Especially every day to make him doubley-hard.

5. HE'S GOT A SCAR ON HIS FACE FROM A FIGHT

[natalie_1982]

I wouldn't have anywhere to warm my cold bits up during the winter.

[China Doll]

But Pinky.... I thought we loved our glass toys more... especailly if we have them with bacon, followed by strawberry ice cream and cream pie... or am I just really confused now??

Awooga Awooga... help brain going in to melt down with all the new facts I've learnt!!! Arrgh!! ;0)

[cascarelli]

Oh my life, someone straighten her out!!!!

[Champagne]

Nat, I have the sandwich thing too!! If he makes bacon butties at the weekend they're always served up uncut. I have to cut my own. He even spreads butter in a manly way (i.e. a dollop in the middle of the bread, completely foresaking the edges).

I would also like to add to the list:-

16. EASTERN EUROPEANS - being proud of the fact that he can spot them a mile away. Especially the Polish ones.

17. PIKIES - being proud of the fact that he can spot "do as you likies" a mile away. And even better, knowing 1 or 2 of them.

18. CLOTHES - Wearing nothing but designer clothes and knowing the designer football clothing rule (I only learnt about this on Monday night).

[Champagne]

I think what China means is that if it wasn't for you men us girlies would be eating lobster every night and we certainly wouldn't have any lice problems. Isn't that right China?

[China Doll]

LFAO!!! Nope.... no lice problems at all... but then what would we do with the bacon? Who'd pull the string?

[PinkFizz]

lice???? good god!!

[PinkFizz]

China - you need help love!! I've emailed you -at least I think its you!

[China Doll]

Nah... no help needed, I get by.... as long as you and champers can answer the trickier questions in life for me I'll be fine! ;0)

[Champagne]

I think you got a bit confused about the bacon, dearest. That heightens the pleasure for b@stards, I mean, men.

[China Doll]

Oh right... I'll scrap the bacon then and go back to using it for sarnies...

[China Doll]

The guys I used to live with absolutely had to have the remote control sitting right next to them...

[natalie_1982]

Champers, totally agree about the Polish thing, (think this mostly applies to any man that works in manual / labouring trade and usually ends with "bl00dy good grafters though").

Pikies not so much of a problem by us, but hubby quite proud that he can tell a "real" Yardie from a "rude boy".

[Champagne]

Natalie I'm cracking up laughing here! Hahahaha! He sounds soooo much like my boyfriend that I think they may be twins! Does your man also describe himself as a 'good grafter'?

[mccfluff]

well i'm supposed to be putting a chair together, only it looks like to much hard work, so i flounced straight into the IT office and dumped the contents of the box on the floor, sat there looking puzzeled and examining bits of kit, took oooo all of 20 second for them to take over and build it for me! Men i love em

[cascarelli]

Well, thank goodness someone's found a use for us

[China Doll]

Have to say... I was most proud of myself for fitting together a book shelf, hooking up a hi fi and a DVD player to my tv all in one weekend once... I was just going to call the guys over but decided against it.

However I have twice had to be rescued from a large bug and getting my key stuck in a door... oh the shame!

Awww Cas, we love the menfolk really, they're lovely. Confusing but lovely!

[The Sherman]

was killing myself at the mention of 'poking a fire with a stick' hahaha theres something so basic inside us men that we have to play and poke a fire. i love doing that, me and my mate will stand round and discuss the fire and decide how best to A make it bigger or B tackle it and put it out!

[cascarelli]

Confusing? Us?????

Anyway, must admit I do mccfluff's trick but with the washing machine......grab a handful of coloured and white clothes and say something like 'all these for the wash?'. The missus comes running screaming 'i'll sort it out, leave it'. Brilliant!

[mccfluff]

China its not that i'm incapable just lazy and if i can con a man into doing it i will!