Funerals: Burial or Cremation?

[VillageVicar]

Which do you prefer? And if you prefer cremation, may I ask, please, what would you like done with your cremains? (ashes).

[FUZZYBEE]

Cremated and then made into a firework, then I want my two girls to be with family and friends and let me off!!

[donella]

cremation for me, nothing do do with fears of "waking up in the coffin" or anything like that i just feel that the deceased seem to take up rather a lot of space when buried!!
i know grave yards can be beautiful places but you cant just go waking over the graves and there is always an air of sadness there,
i will probably be scattered in the country, somewhere i like walking the dogs, probably illegal, but lets face it, if that's what i want what is to stop my friends and family doing it?? it would only take a few mins, and i don't want to be let out of the urn all controlled, I'm talking find a spot in the undergrowth and just scatter in a random and quick fashion! then off to the pub for a bevy!

[daffy654]

I am going to have a woodland burial,the thought of being laid to rest amongst the trees and wildlife really appeals to me.I'm also having a cardboard coffin so it will bio-degrade quickly.

[VillageVicar]

Fair question Laurence! For most of my life, I�ve had the highest respect for the Aboriginal Canadian Indians, where they surrender their loved ones bodies to the winds. They place the deceased on a perch, similar to a bed on stilts, and leave the deceased for nature to claim back. I find that concept to be poetically appropriate to my own spiritualism.

However, given that I am here in England, and the neighbours may not look kindly upon me being hoisted to the church roof, I�ve opted for cremation. I�d like my cremains to be buried directly into the earth, without an urn, and a small marker that says �Happy to be among those I�ve served.� (My thought being that almost everyone on the cemetery hill has been served by me.)

For those who have the fear of burial, I�m aware of an almost equal number of people who are afraid of the cremation process. I have no fear of either. I do, however, have a number of concerns about some of the funeral services I work with. But that�s for an entirely different thread�if at all!

http://bigworldsmallboat.blogspot.com/2006/07/ having-good-death.html

Again, these are fascinating answers. Thank you

Fr Bill

[VillageVicar]

Donella, as I say so often to people:

It is much easier to get forgivenenss than it is to get permission!

I have that inscribed on a plaque over my bed!

Fr Bill

[funnygirl]

I have left wishes to be cremated and my ashes sprinkled on top of my hubby, if he's dead. (He wants to be buried) and if not just keep me until he dies.
I cannot see the point of taking up more space when you are dead. What a waste of land!!!

[bigmamma]

Talking about taking up room with a burial ...our local cemetery are now having a triple plot , that is I mean 3 coffins on top of each in the same 1 size plot. Will we be buried stood up to save room in years to come ?

[moonshadow]

I wasn't aware that scattering ashes into the sea was illegal Fr Bill. I have been to a number of funerals were this has been carried out by the RNLI, a number of my male relations were fishermen and also crew for the RNLI .Is this something new?

[tony1941]

Is it really illegal to scatter ashes on the sea?? Not only does that make me a criminal for disposing of both my parents this way, but both my wife and I have thte same thing written down as a wish for when we go. What possible nanny-state reason can there be for such a prohibition?? Ashes must, by reason of the temperature involved, be absolutley sterile - the only way there could be any contamination would be from the crematorium attendants - perhaps we should ban them from swimming in public?????????

[smudge]

Ditto with funnygirl - I want to be cremated & my husband wants to be buried, so I've said the same to him & our daughters. That way we'll be together.....

We scattered some of my Dad's ashes around his shed & some off Tower Bridge into the Thames. The rest went into a little oak box that my nephew made & in with Mum's coffin when she was buried - so they were reunited again.

[honky-tonk]

requiem mass and burial

[Drisgirl]

My childrens dad who died 5 wks ago was cremated and his urn was interred (by my son) opposite his mums grave.There is to be a headstone erected.Thats exactly what I want -my children now have somewhere they can go to to 'visit' their dad -they know a part of him is there and gives them comfort.

I too couldnt ever contemplate burial -nor do I get comfort visiting a grave - i'm sure you can guess why.

[smudge]

So sorry to hear about your children's Dad Drisgirl.

[bigmamma]

Drisgirl , my thoughts are with you and your husbands children . x

[beryllium]

Oh Dris,
I'm so sorry to read of your news.
I'm sending you all my love darling lady.
B. xxx xxx xxx

[leelapops]

VV, interesting question. Defintely cremation, far less encroaching.

I would like my "cremains" (love that!) at the moment to be scattered in the woods of my "home" town...However, I am 21, so that might change as I find ever more beautiful places. I would it to be near where my dog Jack will be scattered (presuming he goes before me!) so I can see him on Rainbow Bridge. Oh, see, now I am welling up! He's only 3 for goodness' sake! Get grip, Lisa.. :/

Nice to hear everyone's views.

[Hellyon]

Cremated and I want my ashes put in a large flour shaker tied to a kite and then go for one last fly whilst being sprinkled over Covely Green in the New Forest.

( I used to manage a sheltered housing schem and one resident had asked her husband to put her ashes under a rose bush in the garden - rather than dig a hole put the ashes in and plant a rose on top he sprinkled Lily round the bottom of the bush. I had to wait until he had gone out and g and rake Lily into the garden (to avoid upsetting other residents), I got her all over my shoes but enjoyed a laugh with her as all the time I could hear what she would be saying about her husband in my head!)

[VillageVicar]

Hey Beryl! I've seen the diamonds...the challenge is that the pressure required never seems to be achieved. Therefore, the diamond looks almost murkey yellow with carbon pits inside. Considering the cost, I've always wondered whether there might be a better way to memorialise.

I have a friend who's an artist. On several occasions I've brought her ash to mix in her oils, when painting an image of a loved one, or a particular image that is reflective of their memory. I find that quite touching as well.

Fr Bill