Am i being unreasonable?

[breadstick]

My girlfriend has a male friend who she goes for coffee and shopping with a couple of times a week, he is single.


This irritates me and i really cant help it, its not that i think she would cheat with him but its more if people i know see them out together i get the "ooh i seen your gf with another man the other night having coffee" snide remarks,

i had female friends when i was single but since being in a relationship i have explained to them that it wouldnt be right to be out with them,

I really dont like this person my gf sees so there is no hope of talking it through with him, i cant pretend to like him.

am i being selfish?

[jomifl]

No, you are being jealous, perfectly normal but you need to see it for what it is. The sooner you can deal with it the better your relationship with your girlfriend will be.

[jomifl]

You are being unreasonable though.

[Purple_Popple]

Why not Nox?? You see her as a 'gorgeous' friend then and not just the interest in genealogy ?

[DaisyNonna]

Yes you are being selfish. You are trying to isolate her from her friends.
She does not belong to you and has every right to go for coffee or shop with another person.
Being so possessive is not an admirable trait. What happens if you should marry? Would you expect her to give up all her friends? Recipe for a sad and broken relationship. She is a person, not a possession. People need friends.

[DaisyNonna]

Purple, what a load of rubbish. Of course men and women can be friends without wishing to tear each other's clothes off. Sex is not the be all and end all of everything.

[joko]

100% unreasonable

being her boyfriend gives you no 'ownership' rights whatsoever - you cannot control ANYTHING she does.

if you try you will eventually lose.

[NOX]

I merely described her physically, she is gorgeous, I don't want to have to have sex with her to see that, what an odd point of view you have to think I would. I think you are projecting the way you personally think onto other people, which is fine if it suits you, but not everyone is like you, including me.

[Purple_Popple]

Nox, when did I write that you 'don't want to have to have sex with her to see that' as you put it?
I dont have an odd point of view thank you, we are all entitled to think how we think as you are also, and I certainly do not project my view onto others, each to their own, but am merely saying that you obviously find your female friend attractive. I dont find any of my male friends attractive. If i did then I would be in trouble and start fancying them lol. The point of attraction is exactly that.

[NOX]

I can, and most people can, see others as objectively attractive without it being a personal attraction, is that clear enough for you? Just because a woman is 'attractive' or 'gorgeous' doesn't mean I will start fancying her- otherwise it'd be half the planet really because there are a lot of attractive girls about.

[ummmm]

My mate is gorgeous. He's a pleasure to look at...I don't fancy him though. There's more to it than looks.

[pizza]

MMM reading your post it seems that you are more interested in what other people think "ooh i seen your gf with another man the other night having a coffee" snide remarks.
You don't say how long your gf (soon to be ex if you don't get your act together) has had this friend
Good friends are what we all need and yet you drop your female friends when you are in a relationship??
I don't think you are being selfish, childish is a better description it's all about your image and what people might say or think than your relationship !
Oh by the way my guy has had is hair cut by a sexy friend of his for years should I insist now he's seeing me he goes to a man ???
Grow up springs to mind and know I'm not shouting, just giving you my opinion.