putting yourself "out there"

[salisbury]

how do you do this? i know its all about taking chances and risks, but im naturally quite defensive and shy so i imagine there are barriers a girl would need to break to get through to me.

i work 9-5 so barely get chance to meet new people my own age, every weekend seems wasted as my mates are in army or travelling (DOIN SOMETHIN WITH THEIR LIVES) lol, dont get me wrong i have a good job and family,

but surely i deserve some love interest, i just dont see how this will change without me making an effort, but what do i do? go out on my own like a billy no mates??

when i do get chance to go out, i dont get chattin to many girls as i am not the leery leching type.

HELP !!! lol

[Eve]

What kind of things do you enjoy doing? Could you join a local group or evening class or something similar where you'd meet some likeminded people and get more of a social life together.

Getting to know people gradually and having a shared interest may help break down some of the barriers.

[Sasha13]

Have a look on faceparty.com and mysinglefriend.com. I'm in the same situation, these two sites are ok - some strange people but you can filter them out. Good Luck!

[DaisyD]

salisbury, you've got the right idea - you have to get out there and you have to make an effort! If you're shy, this can seem like a difficult task, but it will be SO worth it when you meet someone.
I agree with Jenna - joining a group or class is a really good plan -you'll have to chat to girls but you wont be 'chatting them up' so it will feel more natural to you.
Another thing you can do is ask your mates to (subtly) set you up with someone - like at a party rather than on a blind date.
p.s. not being the leery/leching type is a GOOD thing, and will score you many points with us girls. Chat up lines never work. If you want to approach a girl in a bar, just smile, make eye-contact, offer to buy her a drink and just be yourself.

[yummymum]

Why dont you go out with some of your work mates? 9/5 is probably the best kinda work to do where social lifes are concerned, least you have you evenings free and weekends? Were girls are concerned just talk to us as normal ppl! most girls dont like the 'leery' type anyway and will appreciate you just talking to them and getting to know them

[williaid]

I am single, but find it difficult to attract people to talk to online... having said that I have met some lovely people even if it is only as mates. If I find a secret ingredient I will let you know!

Ian