This kind of problem seems to attract some pretty facile asnwers, but you're serious, so I'll be serious too. If you love Mike, you love him enough to address problems instead of running after the first guy who doesn't appear to present them. If you leave Mike for Bob, then likewise one day you'll be leaving Bob for someone who doesn't fail to live up to your requirements 100%. If you love Mike, you won't leave him, full stop. Don't confuse and complicate your life by failing to address an issue and running away from it. Don't threaten Mike you'll have to leave him, just try and make him see how you'd like him to be more willing to make the first moves. Bless him - and love every move he feels able to make! Forget the 3-some, it won't lead to happiness - many animals are monogamous, and human beings are too, unless they're depraved.