should I leave him?

[notnotnot]

Ive been dating my man for nearly a year but not without much problems. When we first met I noticed on of his girl pals was over the top with him, licking him at parties, touching him, tickling him, taking him away for 'private chats and cuddles' at partys. I at first tolerated it but when she became too much for me to handle I sat my boyfirend down and told him I didnt mind the friendship but the flirting had to stop. (none of his other girl pals act this way) He replied "I want to flirt with her, everyone else does". from then on I've had major insecurity issues with her and I cant seem to let it go.

One time me and the girl had an argument over this to which she said "I dont care about what you think I just want to take him away for private chats and cuddles" my boyfriend was with me when she was saying this and when she went away to get her drink I asked him to tell her to back off. He replyed "Oh I'll tell her not to cuddle me because you have an insecurity". The problems have esculated from here...

I dumped him and days later he was out partying with her and her facebook profile picture was made of her and him cuddling!! We got back together and he cut her out his life completely (because of me). However all his friends hang out with her, shes there everywhere they go. Shes centre of the groups attention and it wont change. I make it very difficult to see his friend which is wrong of me but I hate her.

I want him to see his friends without there being any problems but I cant let this go. I really dislike this girl. Having friends is normal and I dont want to be like this. Its just she is always around. He needs his friends and i'm making it so difficult. I know i'm being very unfair. I do not know what I should do.

Should I dump him and move on with my life?

[askyourgran]

Dump him and move on. Now. Any man that needs it spelling out to him deserves to be dumped, it didn't take him long before he was going out with her the first time you dumped him. The othe girl seems like a good time girl and is up for anything, leave them to it he's an idiot.

[maggie21]

if he isn't listening to what you are asking of him i would get Rid. i wouldn't tolerate another girl cuddling my boyfriend or taking him for private chats i`d get right in the middle of both them and play havoc she`d have no tongue left if she tried to lick him. you sound like a placid person if you see her heading towards him get to him first stand in front of him and block her shadow .

[Prudie]

It's obviously eating away at you so when are you getting any happiness from this relationship? If you can be strong enough walk away, he can't really care about your feelings. Sorry though.

[Roughquest]

That is awful for you to have to deal with notnotnot ! So dont put up with this immaturity any longer, get rid, he is showing a total lack of respect for you, any mature male who valued his partner would not engage in this juvenile behaviour...be strong and dump dump dump, you deserve to be treated better honey. x x

[welshlibranr]

I would drop him from a great height, they obviously have something goin on here! Don't allow yorself to be humiliated!.................If you go on with this, you will be!..........Drop him!.................

[radiogaga]

this girl obviously had boundary issues - she has none.
yes your man has to take some blame too. i personally think life is tooooo short for these sort of shenanigans. move on honey. xx

[woofgang]

The objective rights and wrongs of what this girl and this guy are doing aren't relevant. You don't want a guy you are in a relationship to behave this way. You have told him this and he won't stop. By me that's a deal breaker...so just walk. How would he behave if you had a male friend who behaved this way to you?

[boxtops]

This sounds extraordinary. We went to a party last night and we are good friends with the couples we went with. We always hug and mwah when we meet, men and women (well, the men don't mwah) but while two of the women were up dancing I was sitting chatting with one of their partners - and we have danced with other people's partners - but if we had gone round the corner for private arrangements, that would be completely out of order. I would certainly not expect my OH to have people licking him and drooling over him - it's certainly an issue of boundaries of decent behaviour. If his relationship with this girl as part of his friends' group is non-negotiable, then you will have to think again, otherwise you will be looking over your shoulder all the time. You don't need that. Go find a nice guy who has friends but who has his priorities in the right places.

[Brinjal]

Do you even have to ask the question? Of course you should dump him. He doesnt care about your feelings. He is the type that when he cheats on you sometime down the line he will say you are imagining it and its your insecurities. He is as bad as that low class female. dump the loser.

[tamborine]

he has chosen you as full-time OH, whereas the gf is more like a 'social butterfly' who just tastes the honey & leaves.

You're quite safe from her. He likes your staying power.

[brenda]

A bit like chewing gum , that someone has already chewed.Yuk!!!

[sara3]

he's not putting you first.. dump him.

for what it's worth, I doubt this girl is seriously after him but she has some kind of power over the group and she's loving it.

and she sounds like a right old sad slapper to me ;o)

[ChuckFickens]

Sorry, know it's been said before..... but "licking him at parties"

What?!?!?

[sara3]

oh Chuck, have you never been licked at a party? really?!!

[boxtops]

sara - only when he's wearing his ice lolly outfit LOL....

[sara3]

mmmmmmmmmmm ;o)

[ChuckFickens]

Which outfit is that ? (crtl f5 time)

[sara3]

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......... lol!

why are you registered as female? anything you'd like to share?

[Mick-Talbot]

what's wrong with you all?

♫♪ you'll always find me licking in the kitchen at parties.♫♪

[notnotnot]

wow guys!! I'd just like to take the time to thank everyone who responded to this question. Your right he is pretty much to blame for this and he hasnt respected my feelings! I do worry about it and I guess if I dont dump I will be looking over my shoulder the rest of my life! Thanks people x