my 9 month old sleep PROBLEM

[kathy0926]

Hi

I have a 9 month old who up to recently was sleeping with me. My doctor recommended that I let him cry it out, so I can get him to sleep in his own bed.  Our problem is not the crying,but he will not lay down, he sleeps sitting up, until he iether eventually passes out or somethimes I can lay hm down. We are going on our 4th day.  I am worry about sleep deprevation.  Will he eventually know, just to lay down and not fight it or is he getting himself into a bad habit.

Thank you

A concern, anxious mother Kathy       

[SGKelloe32]

Trust me he will eventually realise that there is no point in fighting it and he will learn to go to bed alone and to go to sleep. Just go in every so often and give him a kiss and a cuddle, so he knows you havent left him all alone. Put a little teddy next to him and soon he will look to that as his comforter and will start to sleep with that!

[andy hughes]

Previous answer is correct - have you tried him with a dummy? Don't worry, he's not sophisticated enough to deprive himself of sleep willingly, when his body is tired, he will sleep, where ever he is. Just reassure him that you are near, and let him get used to his own bed. He will, be patient, and don't worry.

[spunkypumpkn]

hey kathy..

please see the question posted in the parenting section... on the 8th of November I think... called 'Sleep'. There you will find your answer.

[kathy0926]

Thanks for the encoragement.  Well we are on 1 week still waiting for him to lay down like a normal child.  How long can I expect this to go on.  He will sit up,off and on sleeping from2-6 hours.  It is so hard for me to go to bed and get comfortable knowing he isn't.  I do a routine, He normal seems to get tired around 7:45- 8:00 at which pont I start the routine. First He loves sitting relaxing with me on my lap. so I sit him on my lap where I read a couple small books to him, then he sits back and relax by watching a little Tv, then I breastfeed him, at this time he is usually closing his eyes. I tell him moomy loves you, its time for bed as I walk with him to his room, at which point we quickly opens his eyes and starts to cry, I kiss him, tell him I will see you in the morning, I love you and then walk out.  He screams fosr anywhere from 5-20 mintues, then off and on crys out until he finally passes out, there are times he is quite for 2 or more hours, I peak in and there he is sleeping sitting up bobbing back and forth.  It is so heart breaking to me.  My husband says I am to fixated on this, but I can't help it He's my baby. does anyone have any other suggestion, or does it sound like I am doing what I am suppose to

 Thanks again

less concern, less anxious, but obsess mother Kathy

y bab

[Yinzer]

You know, after much mulling and uncertainty around the same time (9 months) I just couldn't bear to see my son so sad (he doesn't know what's going on!) and got OK with sleeping with him for a bit longer. It breaks my heart to hear about yours, and I suggest that if it's not wearing you down completely to try co-sleeping a bit longer. Now, at 11 months I do feel it getting closer to the point where he'll be able to handle being "weaned" off of sleeping together. Some babies are just high-need babys, who don't seem to accept certain changes we try to make, and who need to be a bit more emotionally and mentally developed before they can handle that stuff. These are the kind of babies who grow up to be the kind of people who don't easily give up on their goals. Husbands can sometimes be harsh by a mother's standards. If it were up to my husband we would have locked the baby up in a different room from day one every single time he began to cry. Obviously you feel unsure of what you are doing, and a mother knows best so I say give the boy a little longer to enjoy being a baby. Also give yourself a little longer to enjoy him being a baby because soon enough you will be missing these days of such intimacy. Is he in a crib? Have you tried putting him down after he is asleep? My son wouldn't have it, and the only way I could feel right about his sleep and also have some time with my husband was to put his mattress on the floor so I could lay with him until he'd fall asleep then dash off to our bedroom. Again, it's all about what works best for you. Maybe your house isn't suitable for a 9 month old on the loose. Maybe you are just too exhausted or maybe you and your husband seriously need some privacy. But you may be surprised at how accurate your own decision making skills are. No matter what you decide to do, just realize that this seems like eternity now but in a few months it will be only a distant memory. You'll be alright! Please let us know what happens.