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Mad over Fifties Club

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ladyalex | 18:59 Sat 18th Aug 2012 | Quizzes & Puzzles
259 Answers
The Club is now Open


Welcome once more to each and every one of you.

I am sure that the fort was held in excellent and robust fashion in my absence and that Matron and the Butler did all the necessary paperwork and stocktaking at the end of proceedings.


So far for tonight's raffle I have:

Four dressings (large, non-adhesive)
Three tubes of Savlon
Two rolls of cotton wool
and 54 plastic pinnies.


I have had no word yet of a speaker this evening, but no doubt a member will step into the breach if no one turns up.

Now where are my raffle prizes from the last 2 weeks ?
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Welcome all, what an influx.
Another marvellous ode, DT. You're on fire tonight.

Noteef...plastic pants are a sufficient, but not necessary condition of joining this club. Welcome aboard.
Good evening to the misses sibton & lady-j, also to mr noteef (underwear is optional, so plastic should be fine, sir) - flagons of Phew all round, I think.

Refills for the Bard & plumber...
A "Matron's finest tailcock"........????? lol and excelsior...thank you! :-)
yellow wall paper. do hope i win that.
The main offering, the third of the Castle Olympic Games series.

"The Closing"


And despite all the ballyhoo—the Castle Games
and the tailcocking, Zac beers and the Sqad wounds,
the Mamya buffet and Alec lamentation,
the glaring Polarbear lights sparkling, the Castle moat.

The gloom of AlexanderEd’s silence descends —we stand awed
by the impossible dialogue of the grandest Over 50s tall tales, the gathering of ABers within the Castle walls,
the devouring of Voltra-Vons and mini-Meltons.

The Saturday rituals conceived and preserved in lard
by the Nungates and Daisys, stalwarts of our tribe. Catacombs of isolated closets in the hovels of the LieInKing,
hidden in the shadow of silence before Lady A’s encrusted words.

Here the closed-in AB world is shattered
by the noise of the Invisible Games Guests travelling across the moat,
the woods, crafty entrances, with flumpy patois and Mrs O’s dialects diverse,
Traci myths, Naomi faiths, Jemisa jokes, ratter thirsts, AB hungers, to arrive

in this temple of the Castle, this place
where we become AB children again,
filled with tinksy wonder, NoM dreaming and jealousy,
giddy with power in our tilly leaps and vodka cooking skill.

We learn again to love and tenrec jest,
to lick our croc bitten wounds and gloat,
to learn the perils of sibton power and owdhamer test,
the din of trolls amassed at the AB borders.

The venerable AB assistance of the noteef weak,
the miracle of AB bodies reduced to
flabby Tony arsey “muscle”, sweat, wyedyed nerves and tears,
the equalizing humility of the Slinky single lane,

of the open Castle games field, of the clean
sheet of rippling moat circles, the wooden horsehoes court
the cool Humber sand, the Seadogg waterways, the petal fields of play the open Excelsior fields of mcfluffy hay.

We ABers are coming…

We ABers are coming

London…
not bad
not bad at all
The Castle far better

Rio…perhaps
season the Talbot drums,
tune up Eccles’ claviola,
polish RockyRaccoon’s pandeiro,
oil Ann’s waistline,
simmer the Alba moqueca.

Pour tailcocks at the throat tree root,
appease the Lady J elbow wounded,
pour TTFN gasoline flames on the Castle rivers;
Gness, please let them burn, let them burn, Phew no A&E.

We are coming….the 2016 Castle Games
we will soon come around again….the Castle Games/ Bawdy songs, feasting banquets and tailcock rains, the ancient Castle Games that surpass any Olympic flames.
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Could I have another refill, please, Maj?

I'll miss the llama.
Hope I win the yellow wallpaper. It will go nicely with the puce paint in the boudoir.
phew superlicious tonght. that distilled straw flavour ......umm....what is the exact word?
I'm so hungry, the buffet looks delicious
puff, pant, wait til I turn around then show up...

Ah, good evening, mr excel & miss nungate! A flagon, sir & your usual bucket, miss.

A 3-legged llama has just hopped into the croc's place to redeem his wooden leg, miss - perhaps you could show him around?
Oh my goodness...It seems very "high brow" in here! I don't know if I can keep up!
Your flagon, m'lady!

So am I...
Question Author
DT you truly deserve the Bardic Throne.

I'm overawed by your efforts.

That spooky voice is at it again.....
i know my place lik. will do as you at any time
thank you, buttle.

this is shaping up to be a busy evening.

i see DT is on his usual form
should read as you wish - wretched keyboard.
Question Author
Is that one of the Castle Games ? Keeping up the high brow ?
Yep, the bard is in excellent form.
Question Author
Careful, ladyj...don't promise what you cannot deliver....
not too high brow I hope - I get don't like heights (which is why I never stroll the battlements though I believe the view is superb)
The bard lowers his eye brow at the Invisible Lady.......and blows to see if she is still here

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