Quizzes & Puzzles13 mins ago
No Birthday Gift From My Boyfriend.
49 Answers
Hi everyone,
Can I ask your opinion?
On Saturday it was my birthday (31st) and I did not receive a gift from my boyfriend of four and a half months. Am I right to feel a bit put out?
The night before my birthday he asked me what I wanted and I (feeling embarrassed to be put on the spot at such a late stage) said don't worry about it. On Saturday morning when I got back to my house there was a card from him which was nice.
I then went for lunch with my family and he joined us after. Still no gift, we went to the shops and got something nice to eat for dinner (we stayed in). We did pop by Neals Yard as he wanted to pick up some items and he did buy me some lavender oil after I said that I needed some. However, he carried the bag out of the shop and as far as I know that bag is still sitting in the hallway of his house.
So that was it...
I feel a bit ashamed to expect a gift but that's what people do isn't it? And even if you're not sure you buy flowers or chocolate. I don't doubt that my boyfriend loves me but how to communicate that he ballsed up this one? Or do I just let it go.
(For the record when it was his birthday a week after we first met I turned up at his party with a bottle of gift wrapped vintage port from Harvey Nichols. It's also not a money issue as he bought himself several other things whilst we were out shopping on Saturday and I know what's in his bank account)
Can I ask your opinion?
On Saturday it was my birthday (31st) and I did not receive a gift from my boyfriend of four and a half months. Am I right to feel a bit put out?
The night before my birthday he asked me what I wanted and I (feeling embarrassed to be put on the spot at such a late stage) said don't worry about it. On Saturday morning when I got back to my house there was a card from him which was nice.
I then went for lunch with my family and he joined us after. Still no gift, we went to the shops and got something nice to eat for dinner (we stayed in). We did pop by Neals Yard as he wanted to pick up some items and he did buy me some lavender oil after I said that I needed some. However, he carried the bag out of the shop and as far as I know that bag is still sitting in the hallway of his house.
So that was it...
I feel a bit ashamed to expect a gift but that's what people do isn't it? And even if you're not sure you buy flowers or chocolate. I don't doubt that my boyfriend loves me but how to communicate that he ballsed up this one? Or do I just let it go.
(For the record when it was his birthday a week after we first met I turned up at his party with a bottle of gift wrapped vintage port from Harvey Nichols. It's also not a money issue as he bought himself several other things whilst we were out shopping on Saturday and I know what's in his bank account)
Answers
Let it go, and the next time you are a little shy to say what you would like, tell him to surprise you.
16:01 Mon 13th Oct 2014
Some people just don't think birthdays are as important as others.
My husband doesn't get it either, but years of "coaching" (some may say nagging), and he's getting better.
You need to be completely upfront with him about what you expect with regards to birthdays and Christmas.
I think you have to let this birthday go, but in future you need to tell him that you do expect a present. Doesn't need to be big or expensive, just something he has put a bit of effort into would do.
Try to focus on the fact that he did by you lavendar oil, he probably thinks that was a great present as you said you needed it.
My husband doesn't get it either, but years of "coaching" (some may say nagging), and he's getting better.
You need to be completely upfront with him about what you expect with regards to birthdays and Christmas.
I think you have to let this birthday go, but in future you need to tell him that you do expect a present. Doesn't need to be big or expensive, just something he has put a bit of effort into would do.
Try to focus on the fact that he did by you lavendar oil, he probably thinks that was a great present as you said you needed it.
He asked you what you want and you said 'don't worry about it'- so he hasn't. Some people are very literal, next time he asks you tell him, he had all of the following day to get your wish, you took that opportunity away from him and now it's making you feel miserable. Just be more definite and I'm sure it'll be fine.