Do you believe people never really change?

[Rubyrose]

I don't mean 'criminal can't reform' and things like that! I mean friends and the friendships you hold?

I went to Sheffield for the weekend to visit one of my longest running friends and her little baby boy who is 1yr old. I haven't actually seen her since she was 5 months pregnant but we have spoken on average about 2-3 times a week... mostly via text. I drove up there with a friend we used to hang about with and I don't see her often either but after a drunken night in town we decided it was time for a road trip and a catch up. No sooner had we arrived we were all acting like we did when we were 15.. and we were talking in ways I haven't heard in years and saying all the silly things we used to say! All the memories came flooding back and we had the best weekend ever!

Do you really think people change? Or more importantly... Do friendships ever change?
We are all grown up now, run in different circles, and have different lives... but we felt the same as we did 7-8 years ago!

[redhead23]

its like that when i get with my mates who i went to nursery with , they are my longest running friends and can always make me feel better and make me laugh - plus we all have a genuine deep love for each other which is fab!

[red~bez]

Hiya rubes...x

I have been best friends with my brothers wife for over 30 years... (god I sound old now......lol )........ We have been bezzie mates since we where 13..... We have had major fallings out over the years....but we always resolve them and move on...... We are always there for each other :)
We have had some cracking nights just chatting about the old days.... :)

[ELVIS68]

Good friends never change, last month I bumped into an old mate who I haven`t seen for nearly 6 years, after all the "how ya goin" an all that.... he asked me about the �20 he lent me all them years ago, as I say friends never change, I told him I`ll give it to him next time I see him lol

[Rubyrose]

Yes! Thats exactly what it is! It's a love that I don't feel for my friends I have now! I am not saying I don't love them, coz I really do.. but its different. These girls are my true friends and have known me through thick and thin and we have been there for eachother during major changes and troubles! I miss them already! ;o(

[RATTER15]

I had a best mate, we grew up together done everything together until we were 16 he then moved to the USA, when he came back for a holiday he was the biggest knob you have ever met, he just wanted to impress me with all the talk of big cars and big money, I was not impressed one bit!!

Haven't seen him since and no desire to.

Yes people can and do change!!

[red~bez]

Yep in agreement with Ratter there.......a few months back someone from Friends Reunited sent me and email....and asked me to contact them......she was a good mate at school btw, but hadn't seen or heard from her since we left...... I arranged to meet her.....just to catch up.....OMG!!!.....she certainly wasn't the girl I knew from school.......it was me me me......and I have this and that......she had become so big headed....and she wasn't a bit like that at school. She gave me her telephone number and asked me to stay in touch......needless to say.....I haven't bothered.

[Rubyrose]

But can I ask.... were those people you were honestly the best of friends with? I don't mean the kind of friendship where you just call them your best friends but the kind where you would have died for them?

My friends who I saw at the weekend were there on a night out when I was 15 and I had an epileptic attack... I didn't know I had epilepsy and it scared the cr@p out of them and they still have nightmares about that night! But one of them called and ambulance, ran in a pub and grabbed a doctor, and the other shoved her fingers in my mouth and stopped me from swallowing my tongue! I would die for them... I would have done 7yrs ago and I still would now! Both of them have sons now who are both a year old! They were there for me when me and my ex broke up... and we don't see eachother often but things never change when we do!

Does that friendship ever change?

[sense4all]

I know exactly what you mean, it's good for us just to let it all hang out with people we have been through thick and thin with. People who really know what makes us tick and still love us, like we love them.

[Rubyrose]

What's weird is... (and this may sound gross) but the comfort never changed now matter how long it is until we see eachother because my mate was chatting to me and sitting on the loo peeing with the bathroom door open, and I was in the shower and my mate was at sink brushing her teeth.. but I wouldn't do that with hardly any of my 'now' friends!

One of the things me and my 'old friends' love to do the most is sit and eat toast, drink tea and play cards... Because we used to do that all the time coz we thought it was so grown up... Lol. (that was in between all the havoc we caused)

[RATTER15]

Rubyrose, my fiend was like that as well (OK so we never shared the bathroom), we were best mates from toddlers, we went everywhere together, grew up went through thick and thin together, until he went to USA and came back with a gross American accent after 12 months. All he wanted to do was make me look small and himself look like the big I AM!!!

[Rubyrose]

Do you not believe the real friend is still in there though? You can't change someone's roots! That friendship was part of his growing up, his shaping and his making! I doubt very much this 'new him' is anything more than a 'show' put on my some kind of emotional need! It won't last forever!

There used to be 4 of us... who all hung around together.. but we don't see one of the girls anymore as she slept with one of the other girls boyfriends.. but... in her defence.. she was going through a very bad time and she did some stupid things which she more than likely regrets now and has grown up! I am sure... Sure... that we will all be back to normal one day.

[sense4all]

To everyone who meets my friend she is the consumate professional in the Teaching field - when I knew her she was a hard up single mother who was returning to Uni to get degree. If you went to visit you brought tea bags and loo rolls ....We still have a laugh at how her POSH parents would have stepped over her ten years ago ... now they hang on her every word and toadie like there's no tomorrow!! Still we miss each other, as she lives in another part of the country but it is still like yesterday when we talk or get together. Sometimes we just phone to hurl abuse at each other like you can't with your kid, hubby or the person you need to vent about , we just understand - until the next call / visit. Priceless friendship.