The mother-in-law arrives home from shopping to find her son-in-law boiling angry and hurriedly packing his suitcase. "What happened?" she asks anxiously. "What happened!! I'll tell you what happened....
I am on my own at the moment,tv rubbish,eyes are sore with reading so much,i might do some cooking ,I have a huge carton of mince to cook,so I will think of something to do with that, then what ???...
Not the same without Ronnie Barker, David Jason wasted on this, trying too much to re-enact the original, not many corner shops now where the owner wears a brown overall wasn't impressed with the...
Has anyone had experience of getting a mobile phone for a senior who wears a hearing aid?. It needs to be big button and easy to use as the person is 85 years old and has never used a mobile phone...
A young unmarried girl discovers that she is pregnant. Scared,she confides this 'news' to her mother. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, 'Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to...
There was this bloke who had been to about every pub in town. So one night, he hopped into a taxi cab and told the driver to take him to the best pub in town. The cabby took him to a pub, where he got...
On day a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde were on their way to heaven. God told them the stairs to heaven were 1,000 steps and on every step he was going to tell them a joke. If they laughed they...
I'm often accused of eavesdropping. I just wish they'd have the guts to say it to my face I was telling a funny gag in the garden today, but the punch line was greeted with silence. Later on, my...
My mate insists on being called 'N' by everyone. He'll do anything to be the centre of attention. Why do celebrities call their children such silly names. My parents called me Robert because they had...
I like Nick Knowles, his DIY prog is entertaining and he is ok on other stuff also. HOWEVER, he is doing my head in by repeating how many thousands of pounds people can win every single time he takes...
Blonde one A blonde walked into the pet store and, after looking up and down the aisles, asked the sales clerk for help. "I'd like a box of birdseed," said the lady. "For which kind of bird?" he asked...
Paddy decides to take up boxing and goes for the required medical. A few days later the doctor 'phones and says "Paddy, you've got sugar diabetes." Paddy says, "Nice one, when do I fight him?" A...