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Hopkirk

361 to 380 of 1163

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Hopkirk
I used to be addicted to the Hokey Cokey, but then I turned myself around.
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Hopkirk
My uncle has been taken into hospital with abdominal pain. When they x-rayed him they could see six toy horses in his stomach. The doctors describe his condition as stable....
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Hopkirk
A shop assistant fought off a robber with a labelling gun. Police are looking for a man with a price on his head....
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Hopkirk
My dog is called Shark. I'm not sure it was such a good idea to take him to the beach yesterday....
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Hopkirk
I went into a shop and asked "can I have a bottle of shampoo please" The assistant said "extra volume? "CAN I HAVE A BOTTLE OF SHAMPOO PLEASE!"...
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Hopkirk
I've left my job in a shoe recycling factory. It was sole destroying....
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Hopkirk
The man who invented wordsearch has died. His funeral will be held next TTISVPGKMP HJGUONQUXJ NMONDAYWZ BATKTENOPG HCVNKOTDIM...
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Hopkirk
I didn't understand when my wife said I was holding the bag of pasta upside down. Then the penne dropped....
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Hopkirk
My wife and I are tightrope walkers. We met online....
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Hopkirk
Have you noticed that several formula one drivers have names of Scottish towns? Stirling Moss Eddie Irvine Lewis Hamilton Ayr Town Centre...
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Hopkirk
I just rang the council to ask permission to have a skip outside my house. "Go for it fatty" she said "you could use the exercise"....
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Hopkirk
The difference between men and women is that if a woman asks you to smell something, it is usually nice.
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Hopkirk
Apparently tequila probably won't save your life, but it's worth a shot.
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Hopkirk
My wife asked if I knew any tennis puns. I replied "They're really not my forte, love."...
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Hopkirk
Have you had difficulty communicating while overseas? I struggled at a McDonald's in the US After placing my order the staff member rapidly said what sounded like "izitagaw". I said pardon a couple of...
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Hopkirk
My inflatable house got a puncture last night. Now I'm living in a flat....
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Hopkirk
I said to my wife "Would you like a KitKat Chunky" Five hours in A&E....
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Hopkirk
I keep saying "Welsh rabbit" instead of "Welsh rarebit". I think I'm suffering from mixing my toasties....
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Hopkirk
I'm dating an anaesthetist. She's a local girl....
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Hopkirk
I just met a girl who runs a battery kiosk in our local park. She sells C cells by the seesaw....

361 to 380 of 1163

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