missprim Member Profile in The AnswerBank

The Pianist

A man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down and places the bag on the counter. The barman walks up and asks what's in the bag. The man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little man, about...

Wharton

Education

A was educated at Oxford. Govan High masel....

shooty

IMPORTANT HEALTH WARNING !!

Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness? Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive? If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about...

marval

Old lady

An old lady lived by herself in a small house in a small town. One day she went to the local grocery store and while she was gone a criminal broke into her house, took her clothes off of the line,...

starone

Which syndrome?

Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: "I'm sure...

micmak

Why can you only buy 2 packs of 16 pain killers?

If you wanted to do yourself in, you surely just go to several different shops. Or am I missing something?

ronni21

nhs dentists

after searching for a ns dentist for the last 18 months and calling approximatly 100 within my county i finally got one. it was with one that takes people from my old address and when they rang me i...

missprim

How often should you see your children when..........

you separate from your partner? Rather not say who I'm asking on behalf of but at the moment it's not going down the route of divorce, courts etc. The child in question is 5yrs old....

netibiza

Corrie - Frank and Sally?

Having just caught up with Monday's episode, how do we know that Sally was raped by Frank? Have I missed something?

DTCwordfan

Seeing Nuns and Penguins are a theme this PM

Two guys were at a bar arguing with their friend, who was a midget. Suddenly, out of nowhere, the Pope walks into the bar! "Oh my God it's the Pope " they all say at once. The midget says to...

Jemisa

Poor Grandad...

" There was a family gathering, with all generations around the table. Mischievous teenagers put a Viagra tablet into Grandfather's drink, and after a while, Grandad excused himself because he...

parkie

Five word story challenge

On the radio yesterday morning, listeners were challenged to come up with a five word story. One example is:- Spurs six Arsenal nil.Result. Anyone think of any others?...

missprim

Dead penquins

Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica where do they go? Wonder no more ! ! ! It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an...

marval

Some Service

The lonely bachelor wrote to a dating service explaining that he had specific criteria for a potential mate and would not accept anyone who falls below his standards. He went on to explain that the...

starone

Winning at Lotto

One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring. "Where did you get that ring?" her husband asks. "Well, she replies, "My boss and I played the lotto and we won, so I...

leesy31

radio code for renault laguna?

radio code for renault laguna? radio code for renault laguna model number 22DC279/62E production number FD0101260013467...

Sammy48

Coffee Enema Anyone !

I cannot look a cup of Nescafe in the face again after Embarrassing Bodies last night, Yuk !

trt

Strange and Scary Dreams!!!!

The past few weeks I have been having really disturbing dreams which seem so real and I can remember them for days. Some are really scary and unbelievably impossible with people from my past who I...

fruitsalad

Not enough fruit

Im not a great lover of fruit and I know I don't eat anywhere near the recommended amount I especially don't like apples is there a vitamin I could be taking to make up for whatever vitamins I could...