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Patsy33

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Zacs-Master

Burka

Mrs Zacs has bought a sheepskin burka for the winter She looks like mutton dressed Islam...
12:40 Sat 24th Sep 20165 answers, last by Baldric 13:06 Sat 24th Sep 2016
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marval

Dyslexic Girlfriend

My dyslexic girlfriend texted me from the shop asking if i'd like anything brought home. I was delighted when she brought home some adult magazines and videos of naked police women. All I asked for...
21:27 Fri 23rd Sep 20162 answers, last by Patsy33 23:00 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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Chipchopper

Rough Nights Sleep...

I thought my mattress seemed a bit lumpy, so I looked under the sheet. And would you believe it! I found my old tape measure, what a surprise! I don't use it as a rule....
17:35 Fri 23rd Sep 201611 answers, last by Patsy33 18:41 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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andypipwilly

Only Joking

A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage. Sadly, he lost his case....
13:12 Fri 23rd Sep 20164 answers, last by Patsy33 16:34 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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Hopkirk

Auntie Marge

I've just been to see my Auntie Marge. Marge isn't her real name, but she always seems to be ill. I can't believe she's not better....
12:06 Fri 23rd Sep 20165 answers, last by Patsy33 16:32 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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Patsy33

Package.

I got a package in the post last week, and on it it said, ‘Please don’t bend.’ So how was I supposed to pick it up?”...
10:16 Fri 23rd Sep 20166 answers, last by roger 23:10 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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sixpence999

Wildlife In Scotland

Would appreciate some help...all found in Scotland 11. Talk and talk (6) 32. Worry cub's parent (6) Thank you...
09:47 Fri 23rd Sep 20163 answers, last by Fairlight 22:28 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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queenofmean

Feeling More Human

today :) feels brilliant! Bought my Speedway Tickets so it makes me smile - got something to look forward to :) Best go get ready to face the day Hope you all have a lovely day :)...
09:08 Fri 23rd Sep 201610 answers, last by queenofmean 14:57 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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Smowball

Cleaning Gas Stove Burners

They have really got grubby with baked on food . I've tried the bicarbonate of soda paste left on them but didn't do much. What else can I try?
08:13 Fri 23rd Sep 20165 answers, last by Smowball 18:21 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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waterboatman

Good Morning Early Birds!

Friday. A wee bit cool outside this morning. Snowflake wasn't too keen on going out for a round the block stroll, neither was I come to that! She goes home tomorrow. I shall miss the wee scamp. Tiggy...
04:46 Fri 23rd Sep 201652 answers, last by waterboatman 07:40 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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Ann

Happy Birthday Smowball

Happy Birthday Smow - have a lovely day x
00:14 Fri 23rd Sep 201637 answers, last by Smowball 20:57 Sat 24th Sep 2016
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Pongoparrot

Had It All

This morning I was sitting on a park bench next to a homeless man. I started a conversation by asking him how he ended up this way. He said, "Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to...
21:10 Thu 22nd Sep 20164 answers, last by weecalf 22:12 Thu 22nd Sep 2016
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Bernie

Rte Guide 39

9a. Invariably on edge if describing the iffy politics of Donald Trump (10)??????l?n? 3d Quick snack for Drac (1,4) 5d. Turn that glass eye the other way round- it'll improve your vision by miles...
21:23 Thu 22nd Sep 20165 answers, last by scorpiojo 22:06 Thu 22nd Sep 2016
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marval

I Met

I met my boyfriend in a photographer's dark room. Things just developed from there....
16:20 Thu 22nd Sep 201615 answers, last by Prudie 20:27 Thu 22nd Sep 2016
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Patsy33

Obsession.

People said I'd never get over my obsession with Phil Collins. But take a look at me now...:)...
15:08 Tue 20th Sep 201610 answers, last by Patsy33 17:16 Thu 22nd Sep 2016
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TWR

What Wold You Have Done?

Mirror this Morning, Elderly lady attacked by a Seagull because the Gull's dead chick was in her garden.Yes I know these birds are Protected but there's a limit.
08:03 Thu 22nd Sep 201634 answers, last by hereIam 17:43 Thu 22nd Sep 2016
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Patsy33

Construction Joke.

What about a construction joke? Oh never mind, I'm still working on that one...
13:17 Thu 22nd Sep 20165 answers, last by Patsy33 16:52 Thu 22nd Sep 2016
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youngmafbog

Time To Cull The Moggie?

Seems the thing is a viscious beast responsible for putting some species into extinction. Should we cull them or let them make even more species extinct? Personally I'd be glad if people didnt let...
12:21 Thu 22nd Sep 201622 answers, last by anotheoldgit 10:02 Fri 23rd Sep 2016
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queenofmean

Nitrofutantoin

Dr suspected Urinary infection possibly Kidney and gave me the above. I definitely feel it's my kidneys will these help or should I give the surgery a buzz and say I think I need something else. I'm...
13:26 Thu 22nd Sep 20168 answers, last by frugalfred 14:57 Thu 22nd Sep 2016
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Patsy33

Odd Job Man.

I got an odd-job man in. He was useless. Gave him a list of eight things to do and he only did numbers one, three, five and seven....
21:13 Wed 21st Sep 20167 answers, last by Patsy33 10:38 Thu 22nd Sep 2016

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