Giving up all hope :(

[lorla]

Hubbie and I have now been trying for a baby for 20 months with no success. We have both been 'tested' and there is nothing wrong with either so it's very odd. I have managed to remain positive for the most part but really feel like I can't go on for much longer, my patience is wearing thin and I feel like giving up. My dilema is this - I am a firm believer in positive thinking, it's what's got me through this horrible ordeal but after month and months of disappointing I have realised that actually the worst part is feeling so positive is that I manage to convince myself every single month that we have done it, that I'm pregnant....and then when I'm not, the come down is horrific and I fall to pieces. I feel now that if I didn't feel so positive each month, I wouldn't feel so awful when it's yet another 'no'. I feel lost, if I haven't got my positive thinking, what have I got?

[askyourgran]

After losing two babies at 4 months I gave up hope of carrying a baby, I thought there must be something wrong with me. I decided to just carry on with our lives together, if I became pregnant again and went full term, that would be fine, if not, we had each other. Two years later I had my daughter. Forget about the paraphenalia of pregnancy, live your lives comfortably. Not everyone is lucky enough to get pregnant straight away anyway.

[4getmenot]

'dont go to loo straight after sex' ?! the wee hole and noony are not same thing, weeing wont flush the sperm out. And always go to loo straight after to stay clear of any water infections.

[sara3]

I think you need a few months "off". enjoy being a couple, use contraception (only for a while!) and then see how it goes.

it took me almost 2 years to fall pregnant the first time.. it becomes a bit all consuming!

don't be so hard on yourself, and best of luck :o)

[annie0000]

me too normally 4get - it was the act of getting up and going that lets gravity drain all the good stuff while you are peeing. staying lying down just gives it a wee bit of a helping hand. I am really not that thick!!!!!

[4getmenot]

maybe wee doing a hand stand on toilet letting it all dribble down your body into the pan lol

[annie0000]

sounds like a plan 4 get :o)

I still think I got pregnant the first time because I went out for a drink to celebrate getting the all clear, got pished and couldn't be gassed getting out of bed for a wee after doing the business. My lazyitus is now 10 and fast asleep in bed. Following the Beckham's naming strategy for naming their first child, we did consider calling him Drunken Stupor but thought he may get teased!

Always worth a try.

[4getmenot]

lol. im guess im more cautious after cystitus

[nannakath]

I was experiencing this many years ago and was sent to a `sub-fertility` clinic. I fell on soon after and ended up having five children after that but I`ve never forgotten the early years of disappointments. So take heart and try not to get too stressed.