Mad Over 50's Club now open

[Mamyalynne]

A very Happy New Years Eve welcome to all , i realise many will be busy doing other things but the doors are open and the table is groaning with delights. A trip to the cellar has also produced some tasty tipples, this weeks guest tailcock is

' Old Long Sign' has a seasonal sense to it and a gentle sparkle that augurs good cheer.

For the Rofl :

2 Christmas crackers
Tin foil star
12 AAA batteries
Another bag of pine needles
2011 Calendar
pair of gloves (one green one purple)

I may be somewhat preoccupied this evening as have family staying in the coach house and a VIP in the west wing, so do no stand on ceremony and help yourselves to all treats.

Mamya

[DTCwordfan]

To moats Petal offer AB thanks,
when falling in something like trenches
When writing poetry and drawing blanks,
I often settle using ditches

Petal has been seaching ever more,
hoping again to sing "dirty water" praise.
For "Club" words, we very much adore,
Petal feeling dirty in several ways.

[DTCwordfan]

thank you grasscarp.......time is yet young! Lol

I am trying to drink the house dry here.....wine nearly there, a Tokaji next and maybe a port....

[Ann]

Donald was a successful cattle farmer in Angus and one evening he took his wife to Dundee for a meal at a "posh" restaurant. When he got the (large) bill at the end, he remarked to his wife: "I've done a quick calculation and based on the price of those steaks we ate, I've got cows back on the farm that must make us millionaires..."

[Ann]

THE TREE SQUARES

Wince upon a tome there were tree squares. There was Dummy Square, there was Baddie Square, and there was little Maybe Square, and the wall lived in a cortege in the farwest.

Windy, Dummy Square derided to cook some partridge so she did.

So she did.

And that's when all the rubble farted.

[nungate]

My mum has a wee deoch but I can't find Doris - it is a braw bricht moonlicht nicht the nicht so it is...

[maggiebee]

Nice one Ann. Friend's husband liked his steak well done. If it was served underdone he always sent it back saying "a good vet could get that one back on it's feet"

[nungate]

I've often wondered about cured bacon. If it's cured how come it's on the plate?

[Ann]

Humpty Dumpty was a numpty
Sitting on a wall.
"You're an egg, ya stupid eejit
You'll get broken if you fall".

"Not me. I'm pure invincible,"
The egg was heard to shout.
I think somebody's granny
Must have sooked his brainbox out.

Humpty Dumpty was a numpty
For despite his boast
He did fall. And he did get smashed.
And scrambled... pass the toast.

[DTCwordfan]

Oh Luscious Angus Steak
How your savory juices slither
down Ann's oesophagus
to make love with her stomach

Carnal feelings for her
erupt within her mouth
Oh how she longs
to batter you until tender
and slather you
in the rich sauce of choice

Her love for you, her steak, ravishes her soul
leaving her sullen
until the moment you grace her
with your presence
until the moment she put your AB fillet on
for two minutes on each side
over a blazing open Alex's fire
to lock in the Moaty flavor

[Mamyalynne]

You are all amking me hungry now, am grabbing some pork.

[DTCwordfan]

There's a big old grasscarp down below,
She's not good to eat, but I want to know,
If I can bring her out for a foto op,
But she stays on the bottom, and never comes up.

Mixed up some AYGran flakes and some Big HelenRed,
I hope she is still down there, and has'nt fled,
Got a seadogg reel, and a big long Tony V pole,
Big enough to reach her, in her deep dark hole.

Sitting in the shade, of a sibton tree,
Eating a sandwich, Mamya made for me,
Watching the sunny dave come up in the east,
And hoping and praying I can hook the feast.

I think that she's laughing at us, down below,
Thinking that sooner or later, we'll just have to giveup or go.
I've tried different maggie baits, that she just ignores,
Even polarbear bait and some Ann86 lures.

And she just continues swimming down there,
Staring up through the water, We're really some pair.
Playing our mind games, day in and day out,
I might get me a club, and just give her a clout.
But she'll turn around and give us an AB shout.

[Ann]

Well thank you DT - could just eat a nice juicy steak "to make love with me stomach" but it has to pass my lips first and I can't taste a thing at the mo cos mi nose id blocked! :(

[nungate]

Finally I've got a rhyme.
The Haggis is a bonnie bird
it flits from bough to bough
it makes its nest in the rhubarb tree
and whistles like a cow
Well this does seem to be an evening of poetry amidst all the frivolity - I do like to come here and frivol..................

[AB Editor]

Evening all. I hope you're enjoying your frivols!

[grasscarp]

Aw DT. Thats great. Thank you. Very flattered to be written about. Swims off happily.......

[Ann]

Gosh - sigh, beautiful DT - what a poet, we are HIGHLY honoured to have you in our midst tonight ........... ;0)

[DTCwordfan]

It's just not AB funny

When Ann's nose is blocked then runny;

She feels all groggy and soggy,

Hoarse, ratter and nungate froggy.

Her throat is scratching;

The Sqad germs are hatching.

She know it's Carakeel catching~

KERCHOOO!

[giveup]

I'll try some Old Long Sign with just a couple of pork rolls (with stuffing).
Need cheering up. Husband just phoned from a port somewhere in France,said its not the end of the world but he can see it from there.Do you need more Vodka. I'll just get my shoes off.

[grasscarp]

What a night. Ive eaten some delicious pork, drunk some of the tailcock, flirted with DT, chatted with nungate and others. I think I will quit while I am ahead and before I disgrace myself and drink too much. Happy New year all and thank you Mamya for your great hospitality. x

[Mamyalynne]

Goodnight Grasscarp safe jpurney and best wishes.

To everyone else apologies for my poor hosting skills tonight, my guests are very demanding.

I shall sit with you a while and catch up on the odes and have a long sign