Today we visited Oban a small town of 2000 souls most of whom are Scottish. It has a ferry to the Isle of Skye, also a gateway to the Hebrides. Had a cup of tea and sat by the harbour. While eating a...
I was arrested after smearing somebody’s luggage with Vaseline. The police dropped the case. I had a few mates round last night to watch the match. I’ve never been so frustrated in all my life!...
Haven’t had one for ages, but now, what. Looked on line. Froze it with an ice cube, heated it with a warm used tea bag, bought Zovirax and carefully followed the instructions, but none of it made a...
I took a girl home. We got kissing on the sofa and, before long, she became very excited She asked 'Shall we take this upstairs?' I said 'No, I'd rather we did it here' 'Oh', she winked. 'Something in...
Sad news.. At the Nestle factory today a member of staff was seriously injured when a pallet of chocolate fell more than 50 feet and crushed him underneath... He tried in vain to attract attention but...
My favourite Saturday night programme, Casualty, if off again! Not for football this time, but for the Queen's Birthday Party. Not interested as I didn't get an invite!
A lady was picking through the frozen chickens at a branch of Morrisons but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a passing assistant, 'Do these chickens get any bigger?' The...
Hi everyone & Happy Easter. Can anyone suggest a remedy on how to get furniture indentations out of carpets. I have moved a heavy table and it has left ugly dents in the carpet where it was. All...
Has anyone managed to get good tickets by signing up to a band's website? Is it worth it or do you still get average seats because everyone else had the same idea?
Anyone know what the cost of hard wiring a dashcam would be ? Halfords is quoting £50 - and you must the dashcam from them. I'm quite practical with most things but car electrics is something I don't...
One of my friends who has dwarfism came back from the Job Centre today really cheesed off. "What's wrong?" I asked. "They offered me a job as a lumberjack." "And what's wrong with that?" I replied....
Spanish painter Pablo Picasso encountered a thief at work in his mansion. The intruder got away, and the police were called. Picasso offered to do a rough sketch of what the thief looked like. On the...