One night (a long time ago in a jurisdiction far, far, away - rumour being St Austell aka Awful) a brother was heading home after indulging a bit too much at the festive board after his lodge meeting....
The Salvation Army band was marching down the road. When they came to the 'T' junction at the bottom of the hill the band turned to the left. The man with the big drum went to other way, turning...
Jan, Sue, and Mary haven't seen each other since leaving School. They rediscover each other via Friends Reunited, and arrange to meet for lunch. Jan arrives first, wearing a beige Versace dress. She...
We keep getting callers at our house collecting for various organisations. Why only last week the local old folks home came so we gave them Grandma and Grandad. Yesterday a couple asked if we could...
One morning in a posh hotel breakfast room, a guest called over the head waiter. "Good morning, I'd like to order two boiled eggs, one of them so undercooked that it's runny, and the other so...
There was nothing to do on this Thursday night, so the two students were just hanging around the apartment. Brenda, who was dressed in only a bra and panties, was jiggling back and forth around their...
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, 'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?' 'Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.' __________ A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:...
Two Irishmen flew to Canada on a hunting trip. They chartered a small plane to take them into the Rockies for a week hunting moose. They managed to bag 6. As they were loading the plane to return, the...
The pub had not been open long when paddy struggled in. The tears flowed freely from his eyes and dribbled down his chin. The publican was most concerned at Pats distressing state. Come in and sit and...
Young Bill was courting Mabel, who lived on an adjoining farm out west in cattle country. One evening, as they were sitting on Bill's porch watching the sun go down over the hills, Bill spied his...
A guy goes to the doctor: “Please help me doc. I have this horrible blinking in my right eye that I just can’t control.” Doctor: “Ah come on, it’s not so bad as you think.” Guy: “Oh, you...
A husband and wife presented themselves at the Ryanair check-in desk. ‘Do you have reservations?’ asks the check-in clerk. The husband replies ‘Of course we do, but we’re flying with you...
A fellow woke up in hospital after a very bad car accident and was told by the doctors that he had been so badly injured that they had to replace some of his body parts with those obtained elsewhere...
