Quizzes & Puzzles2 mins ago
NOT a sympathy thread !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
107 Answers
As some will be aware my children lost their children tragically (in a an accident) just 6 months ago. Its been tough - very tough as we have an impending trial. Today- his dad -my childrens grandad was found dead -I visited him as I was concerned as he seemed to have given up when Dave was killed and urged him to please start eating and think of the rest of his family (his wife died at 47) -he assured me he would try -remember I am now on the perimeter of the family. He came to see my mum and dad 2 weeks ago and spoke at length about me and Dave (my first husband and father of my children and sorely missed) and at that point I thought -he has given up -looks like he did. It wasnt suicide -he simply died of a broken heart -how sad is that and selfishly another burden for my 2 to bear-I am weeping as I type this. I just wish that the perpetrator of this event would have just pled guilty and taken the smack on the wrist and at most a years ban -but no -she had to take it to trial. Am I such a bad person for hating this woman with a vengenace -I would have held ny hands up and said 'Guilty as charged' but no she decided to not only try to keep her licence for a lesser limit but the biatch has now effectively cut 2 lives short -but given us all a life sentence.The trial starts at the end of April. (She doesnt have a leg to stand on -well Dave would have had no legs to stand on had he lived -or a head so its all incidental-grr) Would you blame me for being bitter and also what next ??????????????? .Can someone tell me -I have no emotion left for my children-its been all used up-how can I tell them its gonna be OK?
Answers
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No best answer has yet been selected by Drisgirl. Once a best answer has been selected, it will be shown here.
For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.Hello Drisgirl. What a terrible story you have told, and of course I can only offer my sympathy to you and your family.
Where can you find a well of strength for your children when you are so emotionally drained already? You want to be strong for them, and yes, it is understandable that you should be full of anger at the prospect of a forthconming trial.
Yet, life has a funny way of payback, and if you will listen to my advice, it is this. You should try and distance yourself from the outcome of the trial and let the wheels of justice turn in their own time. This woman has more to lose than her licence. Her conscience will prick her for a long time to come. You must not feel the need for revenge, as that will only backfire on you and your children.
Only by accepting what has happened and grieving for your losses, will you come through this. You will never be the same of course. Every bereavement leaves its scars on us, and although they fade, they never go away.
Forgiveness is as much for your benefit as for the benefit of the wrongdoer. It lances out the poison from the soul, and allows the healing to begin.
So, yes, shout and scream on here, and get rid of your anger, then look outside of yourself, and accept what you cannot change, and there you will find the beginnings of strength.
Where can you find a well of strength for your children when you are so emotionally drained already? You want to be strong for them, and yes, it is understandable that you should be full of anger at the prospect of a forthconming trial.
Yet, life has a funny way of payback, and if you will listen to my advice, it is this. You should try and distance yourself from the outcome of the trial and let the wheels of justice turn in their own time. This woman has more to lose than her licence. Her conscience will prick her for a long time to come. You must not feel the need for revenge, as that will only backfire on you and your children.
Only by accepting what has happened and grieving for your losses, will you come through this. You will never be the same of course. Every bereavement leaves its scars on us, and although they fade, they never go away.
Forgiveness is as much for your benefit as for the benefit of the wrongdoer. It lances out the poison from the soul, and allows the healing to begin.
So, yes, shout and scream on here, and get rid of your anger, then look outside of yourself, and accept what you cannot change, and there you will find the beginnings of strength.
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I am so sorry every ne for not replying as quick as i should have but my my dear friend Stevie phoned me (Legend) he continues to be a constant support to me -I will get through all your posts now -I havent been ignoring you all and I so appreciate everything big massive mwahs to ya all and spesh to Stevie xxxxxxxxxxxxx.I am away to read your posts right now xxxxx
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I am soooo sorry for the delay as you know Stevie was comforting me -he is a gem -I dont give an eff what anyone one else says he has always beem a true friend to me xxxx
Tufty -TY xxx
Annie Yeah xx and TY for posting x
Cazzzz -trying ta xxxxxxx
Hua -Cheers Hun xxxxx
CB -eff off-always hovering about like a silent one -lol (linke I feel like lol)
CD -looKs like it TYT for posting
lindalinda -bless hun xx
Icey -as always TY my darling xxxxxx
Mam -Tank you my darling xxxxx
Theland reduced me to tears but its all good -better ot than in -exactly how I feel xxx
sir.prize -you are a gent xx
Stevie I love ya long time -he is a gent among scholars -you all just dont know it -true friend and I love him to bits xxxxx
If I have missed anyone I shall rectify it -this has been really tough as yet again I have NO family to fall back on as it affects them - so reach out to my AB family -for succour-who would have thought it -such is life !!!!
BM -I feel somewhere I have missed you -love ya to bits anyways even if I havent -voice of comfort here xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Tufty -TY xxx
Annie Yeah xx and TY for posting x
Cazzzz -trying ta xxxxxxx
Hua -Cheers Hun xxxxx
CB -eff off-always hovering about like a silent one -lol (linke I feel like lol)
CD -looKs like it TYT for posting
lindalinda -bless hun xx
Icey -as always TY my darling xxxxxx
Mam -Tank you my darling xxxxx
Theland reduced me to tears but its all good -better ot than in -exactly how I feel xxx
sir.prize -you are a gent xx
Stevie I love ya long time -he is a gent among scholars -you all just dont know it -true friend and I love him to bits xxxxx
If I have missed anyone I shall rectify it -this has been really tough as yet again I have NO family to fall back on as it affects them - so reach out to my AB family -for succour-who would have thought it -such is life !!!!
BM -I feel somewhere I have missed you -love ya to bits anyways even if I havent -voice of comfort here xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx