Good Evening fair Castle Pommers, this glorious evening of Fun, Muzak and Mamya Booze & Fare.
We hope that you will be comfy in the Moat, Castle Atrium, Bathroom, Condom Machine Room, Garage, wherever you are. We - I have taken the liberty of booking the AnswerBank Symphony Orchestra and Choir led by Mrs Lottie and starring TTFN as double bass. Miss. Julienne Bream will make a guest appearance to be eaten by Croc.
The Soprano role will be taken by Tony, finely tuned and expertly played by Murray, Sibton, Gness or Mrs O, whoever is here – and do take turns, gals.
Lady A will fire the traditional cannon at 11.11 launching the designated cannon ball and instantly blowing the fireworks.
I attach last year’s resultant bang.
For the riffle I offer this special Bardic evening of low-class Kulture
• One broken conductors stick
• One cracked Ivory
• One Organ Pipe lower octave B♯
• Four burst balloons
• 2 water guns replete with Gin
• One chewed Oboe reed
• One timpani drumstick, covered in BBQ sauce
• One Royal Albert Hall toilet paper roll, half used.
• One score of weird hieroglyphics, marked Sibelius
• One pair of Katie Derham’s knickers.
• One smashed viola, 3rd row, not the instrument
• One handcuff, the chain missing the other
• Map on how to get to the Albert Hall from the Royal Geographic Soc.
• One pair of broken Paralympic blades marked “Made in S.Africa”
• One pair of breeks, marked on the inside, “Prop. HRH Harry”
• 3 paperclips
Tonight, later, I propose a Castle Anthem competition to vote for your preferred Anthem for the Castle Penultimate Night of the Pommes.
Shortly, two sing(or groan)-alongs for later, before your unfair Judgement.
Do join in now. £15.25 to the Castle Slush Fund, Bank Ambrosiano, Luxembourg, inc free Media URL: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-15611160
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