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McMouse

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McMouse

Roman Bar

An Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus. Barman says “do you mean a Martini” Guy replies “if I’d wanted a double I’d have said”...
13:27 Tue 22nd Feb 20221 answer, last by McMouse 13:50 Tue 22nd Feb 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

My friend said "cheer up, you could be in a hole in the ground full of water" I know he means well....
05:48 Tue 22nd Feb 20225 answers, last by McMouse 13:30 Tue 22nd Feb 2022
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Bobbisox1

What’s The Nicest / Worst Thing You Partner Has Done For You?

He’s made me a plate pie with my name on it :0) I don’t like flowers in the house but love them in the garden, he bought me a rose bush which flowers into beautiful yellow roses He hasn’t done worst...
11:43 Tue 22nd Feb 202256 answers, last by zylaphone 16:14 Tue 22nd Feb 2022
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Gromit

Revolting Tories

// Conservative MPs are organising a revolt against the prime minister over the scrapping of a ban on the imports and sale of fur and foie gras. Government sources have confirmed to the Guardian that...
16:16 Mon 21st Feb 202227 answers, last by THECORBYLOON 00:52 Tue 22nd Feb 2022
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McMouse

What A Tool

I wanted to do a joke about tools but awl I could think of was this.
15:52 Mon 21st Feb 202211 answers, last by William51 09:44 Tue 22nd Feb 2022
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ichkeria

What If Trump Was Still President?

How would he be handling the Ukraine crisis? https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2022/02/20/europe/biden-putin-macron-ukraine/index.html I was going to post this in “politics” as it isn’t strictly news but a...
09:38 Mon 21st Feb 202241 answers, last by sevenOP 20:00 Tue 22nd Feb 2022
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McMouse

The Other Day

I visited a psychic and rang the bell. She yelled out “who is it” I didn’t bother...
14:55 Sun 20th Feb 20225 answers, last by Hopkirk 09:12 Mon 21st Feb 2022
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sandra4444

True Or False

As you get older do you become more grumpy?
13:54 Sun 20th Feb 202223 answers, last by William51 10:13 Tue 22nd Feb 2022
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gulliver1

Sanctions

Boris is going to impose sanctions against Russia. He is going to stop them making donations to the Conservative Party, and also stop them from Laundering money through ........ The London...
09:51 Sun 20th Feb 202222 answers, last by William51 10:46 Mon 21st Feb 2022
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Barsel

I Now Have My Table Top Dishwasher

Some of you might remember I was asking about them . https://www.theanswerbank.co.uk/ChatterBank/Question1784742.html Well it does look bigger than I realised, but hopefully I'll get used to it. I...
14:27 Fri 18th Feb 202223 answers, last by Barsel 21:10 Fri 18th Feb 2022
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pat2604

Will People Never Learn!!!!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/in-pictures-60428222 Bridgend !!...
17:26 Fri 18th Feb 202233 answers, last by William51 09:21 Tue 22nd Feb 2022
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gulliver1

Mafia Party

War on the whips..Tory rebel MPs have threatened Police action amid Blackmail claims. Tory MPs who want Boris ousted ....have been threatened by the Chief Whip that they will have funding for their...
08:15 Fri 21st Jan 202225 answers, last by gulliver1 16:56 Sat 22nd Jan 2022
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dave50

Why Have People Started Answering Questions With The Word "So"?

Also when asking for something in a shop or cafe, they say "can I get"? Instead of 'could I have' or 'may I have' ? What's going on?...
13:19 Fri 21st Jan 202225 answers, last by andy-hughes 16:16 Fri 21st Jan 2022
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ToraToraTora

Did You Know?.....Snooker......

The highest break in snooker is generally regarded to be 147, however with a 16 red clearance it is theoretically 155. The first 16 red clearance in a tournament, the World Championships, no less was...
09:51 Mon 17th Jan 202216 answers, last by bookbinder 17:21 Mon 17th Jan 2022
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douglas9401

The Navy Lark

Seems GB is to use different boats to rescue illegal immigrants and bring them here, freeing up the current shower to concentrate on wringing their hands and taking their wages under false pretences.
11:51 Mon 17th Jan 202221 answers, last by tiggerblue10 17:29 Mon 17th Jan 2022
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Rondy

Bread

A Woman Sends a Text to Her Husband “Honey, don't forget to buy BREAD when you come home from work and your girlfriend Valerie greets you.” Husband: "Who is Valerie?" Wife: "Nobody, I just wanted you...
13:14 Fri 14th Jan 20226 answers, last by Spicerack 14:01 Fri 14th Jan 2022
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maggiebee

Sweets

On STV news. Marks and Spencer has changed the name of its popular Midget Gems sweets to avoid offending people with dwarfism. Really!!
15:11 Thu 13th Jan 202223 answers, last by zebo 22:18 Thu 13th Jan 2022
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McMouse

Honour Suicide

Historically disgraced military officers accepted a loaded revolver from a brother officer and retired to their room. Is such a practice appropriate today?...
14:39 Thu 13th Jan 202224 answers, last by joelive2001 16:55 Sun 16th Jan 2022
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pat2604

Empty Shelves

I've been preparing for a lot of missing items on our large Morrisons Click and Collect order today. Result: missing fine sea salt which I find strange. But it's only Hubby who uses it to make bread....
11:32 Thu 13th Jan 202250 answers, last by pat2604 19:06 Thu 13th Jan 2022
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Bobbisox1

He Should Go

I’m surprised nothing more has been said about this...
12:24 Tue 11th Jan 2022125 answers, last by ichkeria 08:53 Wed 12th Jan 2022

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