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Fiancée: You're not committed to our relationship Fiancé: Yes I am Fiancée: No you're not, don't you know the symptoms ? Fiancé: I can't say I do Fiancée: That's one of... ...
Another one from Facebook which made me laugh ;- SANTA IS A YORKSHIREMAN Santa is a Yorkshireman Of this I'm fairly sure I heard him tiptoe in my room At roughly Ten to four "I 'ope tha's fast asleep"... ...
Three men die and go to Heaven, they are surrounded by lovely golf courses, there are rivers and ducks everywhere Gold told them they are welcome to play golf but there is one rule: do not harm a... ...
My friend has been suffering with paranoid delusions - and now he thinks he's a chocolate orange. I worry he's going to be sectioned.
On the roads during the Xmas period, more women drivers will be picking up their husbands from the pub. <:●)
My wife took the car to the mechanic and said, "I'm tired of this transvestite engine."
The mechanic replied while laughing, "You mean transverse engine."
She said, "No it keeps slipping into the... ...
The mechanic replied while laughing, "You mean transverse engine."
She said, "No it keeps slipping into the... ...
Paddy and Finbar came out of the pub and stumbled up the road to the bus stop . They then realised they had missed the last bus . '' I know said Paddy - we will go down to the bus depot and... ...
My mate fell off the roof of the local night club - he wasn't hurt though, he was a bouncer.
Facebook post: If you are going to be alone this Christmas Day, with no visitors, please get in touch. I need to borrow your chairs. 😃
We was so poor as kids my dad went round and closed all the doors on christmas eve just so we could have something to open on christmas morning..
Got some laxatives from the local chemist,
I'm now one of their more regular customers. ___ There is a website for women drivers, it keeps on crashing though. ___ ME: "I saw this couple making love on... ...
I'm now one of their more regular customers. ___ There is a website for women drivers, it keeps on crashing though. ___ ME: "I saw this couple making love on... ...
If anyone has got any advice on how I can stop my kitchen windows steaming up then please pop round. My kettle is always on.
My mate wants to start breeding dogs and asked for my help so I gave him a few pointers.
Did you know that Phil Spector had a brother called Crispin?
He worked in Quality Control at Golden Wonder, apparently.
He worked in Quality Control at Golden Wonder, apparently.
Man seriously injured by reversing car. Police are asking the driver to come forward
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.. I want a man who can take my breath away. So I let rip my best fart ever. Now she won't talk to me. Guess I've discovered how to stop someone nagging,,
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the... ...
At our local chippy, they still use old newspaper to wrap up their fish and chips.
Yesterday I got a plaice in the sun.
Yesterday I got a plaice in the sun.
We always hear about David and Ed Milliband, but nobody ever talks about their equally famous elder brother Glen, whose flight disapeared over the Channel. ___ What part of the human body is called... ...
